Godbook
by TheGreekGoddessAthena
Summary: A new thing has come to Olympus; GODBOOK! Statuses, comments, and bitch fights galore! The Olympians are going to realize that what happens on Olympus won't always stay on Olympus. [Minor Athena/Poseidon themes]
1. Aphrodite's Page

_Godbook _is a creation designed by Allison, (call her Ally, or she'll bite) my best friend. So here, she gave me permission to write a story about _Godbook_.

I do not own the idea, my AWESOME friend does. I do not own Facebook, which this is merely a rip-off of. I do not own PJO. CHAPTER ONE!

_Godbook_

_Welcome to Aphrodite's page!_

**Aphrodite: Hello, hello, hello! **

**Couples of today…**

**Percabeth (Percy and Annabeth): Percy and Annabeth are SOOOO cute together! Annabeth saved Percy's butt countless times. Percy looooooves her. She looooooves Percy! Did you hear? Percy just got back from a ROMAN camp! The WORST part? He didn't remember Annabeth! But he remembers her now and they're closer than ever (much to Athena's disliking)!**

_Comments on Percabeth (5)_

_Athena: It's not that I don't like Percy, I just hate his father. I wish Annabeth would chose somebody else and be wise, but if she wishes, they may date. But Poseidon, this will NOT allow us to be ANY closer. 3:24 pm_

_Poseidon: I agree. For the record, I hate you too, Athena. 3:25 pm_

_Aphrodite: GUYS! THIS IS A STRICTLY LOVE ONLY ZONE! 3:29 pm_

_Athena: If it's a 'love only' zone and Poseidon's in it, I'm not. 3:31pm_

_Poseidon: I agree. 3:33 pm_

**Thalico (Thalia and Nico): UGH! ARTEMIS! WHY? They would be PERFECTTTTTT TOGETHER!**

_Comments on Thalico: (6)_

_Artemis: She chose to be a huntress, Aphrodite. 3:34 pm_

_Aphrodite: Hmph.3:35 pm_

_Athena: Well, that would be a wise pairing. I approve. 3:40 pm_

_Aphrodite: SEE! Athena agrees with me. :P 3:41pm_

_Zeus: My daughter…with Hades' son? 3:45 pm_

_Hades: My son…with HIS daughter? 3:46 pm_

**Clarisse/Chris (thinking of a cute name still): I love it. Not much more to say.**

_No comments on Clarisse/Chris._

**Silena/Beckendorf: May he rest in peace. And may she find another eligible heart to break (:**

_Comments on Silena/Beckendorf: (5)_

_Persephone: That is so sad. Losing your loved one is almost as bad as being stuck in Hell with Hades. 4:00 pm_

_Hades: PERSEPHONE! OFF THE COMPUTER! 4:00 pm_

_Persephone: OR WHAT? What can you do to me? I'm already in Hell. 4:02 pm_

_Aphrodite: GUYS! LOVE ONLY ZONE! 4:04 pm_

_Hades: Yeah, Persephone. LOVE ONLY ZONE! 4:05 pm_

**Grover and Juniper: aw! **

_Comments on Grover and Juniper: (6)_

_Artemis: I guess… 4:07 pm_

_Poseidon: Isn't Grover the goat boy? 4:09 pm_

_Athena: yes, Poseidon, and he's your son's best friend. 4:10 pm_

_Poseidon: I thought that smarty-pants daughter of yours was. 4:11 pm_

_Athena: Fine then. Percy's best MALE friend. And that's a compliment. She gets it from ME. 4:13 pm_

_Persephone: Ohhh, the satyr! 4:14 pm_

**Aphrodite's LOVE tips!**

**Always please the women**

**Buy LOTS of stuff for the girls**

**Don't be afraid to tell the other you love them**

**If you're Percy, DON'T even TALK to/about Rachel**

**If you're Annabeth, NEVER even MENTION Luke**

**If you're Thalia, DO NOT join the hunters**

**If you're Nico, DO NOT mention your father while talking to Thalia**

**AND….never ever, EVER…well, for lack of better words, cheat.**

_Comments on Aphrodite's LOVE tips: (8)_

_Athena: Aphrodite, I appreciate the tips for others, and I agree with the forth one. Very much so. Never liked the mortal girl… 4:17 pm_

_Zeus: Thalia already joined the Hunters. You lose.4:19 pm_

_Aphrodite: A goddess can dream. 4:20 pm_

_Ares: About me! 4:21 pm_

_Athena: Virgin goddess in the comment room! 4:22 pm_

_Artemis: Yeah, seriously! And I'm in the form of a twelve year old! 4:24 pm_

_Aphrodite: Oops… 4:25 pm_

_Poseidon: You lose, Athena. 4:27 pm_

**Today, in the fascinating world of love…**

**Percy FINALLY asked Annabeth on a proper date! This time, there better be no killer cheerleaders/vampires/ugly beasts! Or explosions…or Kronos…or Luke's…or…well, you get the idea.**

**Silena is…still crying…**

**Grover and Juniper (the satyr and the nymph) are finally admitting that they're dating!**

**Clarisse and Chris have not been so well…**

**Ares and I are going on a date!**

**Athena, Poseidon, you both need to accept that your children are dating each other and MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIVES!**

_Comments on Today, in the fascinating world of love…: (9)_

_Athena: APHRODITE! 4:30:17 pm_

_Poseidon: APHRODITE! 4:30:17 pm_

_Athena: Whoa…we both typed the exact same thing at the exact same second… 4:31 pm_

_Poseidon: That never happened. 4:32 pm_

_Aphrodite: Yes it did. 4:33 pm_

_Zeus: Thalia isn't in there…thank Hades! 4:34 pm_

_Hades: You're welcome, brother. 4:35 pm_

_Ares: 7:30? 8:00? 4:37 pm_

_Aphrodite: 8:30! Beauty takes time, you know. 4:38 pm_

**Aphrodite's Fashion Tips: Annabeth**

**Athena, I need you to pass this information to Annabeth, please.**

**Annabeth, tonight you have a date with Perseus. Here is your wardrobe (it's all in the pink, sparkly bag in the top drawer in your dresser)**

**A purple, ruffle tank-top**

**White mini-skirt**

**Purple converse (I know you hate heels.)**

**Silver bangles**

**The not-engagement engagement ring Percy gave you.**

**Annabeth, don't blow it.**

_Comments on Aphrodite's Fashion Tips: Annabeth_

_Athena: Aphrodite, I appreciate the concern you have for Annabeth's date with Percy, but she already picked out an outfit. 4:40 pm_

_Aphrodite: Nope. Now she's wearing this (: 4:41 pm_

_Poseidon: I hope that doesn't make Percy…well, you know. 4:42 pm_

_Athena: POSEIDON! NEVER say those words while I am capable of knowing you said them. 4:43 pm_

_Aphrodite: I hope the same… 4:45 pm_

_Athena: Oh, dear… 4:47 pm_

**Aphrodite has signed out, leaving this message:**

**I love LOVE! **


	2. Athena's Page

Welcome back to Godbook! I know you wanted Hades next, but I already started this one before I got the reviews…Hades will be next.

I don't own PJO, or Facebook, which this is merely a rip-off of (:

_Welcome to Athena's page!_

**Tips to be successful and wise**

**While in a cave, don't spilt up…**

**Don't attack someone bigger than you.**

**When it comes to Annabeth, try to find a boy better than Percy.**

**When it comes to Percy, don't break Annabeth's heart.**

**Don't upset a Cyclops.**

**All these tips can be approved by Annabeth, Percy, and Grover. Well, minus the third one with Annabeth.**

_Comments on Tips to be successful and wise: (7)_

_Aphrodite: Athena, can you just accept that Percy and Annabeth are dating? Oh, and how did their date go last night? Annabeth must've told you allllllll about it, am I right? 8:43 am_

_Athena: Yes, she did tell me all about it. She didn't wear the skirt, but she wore the shirt and converse. She liked the date… 8:45 am_

_Aphrodite: Glad to hear it went well! 8:46 am_

_Poseidon: Yes, Percy told me all about the date as well. He said, and I quote Athena, so don't hurt __**me**__, "Annabeth was…hot…" 8:49 am_

_Athena: …HE WHAT? 8:50 am_

_Aphrodite: Poseidon said that Percy said Annabeth was hot! (: 8:51 am_

_Athena: that was a rhetorical question. 8:52 am_

**Upcoming News…**

**As we all know, Percy and Annabeth are dating. Aphrodite has just informed me—and bolted off to start planning—that we are celebrating this occasion. Anybody in? Please say no…**

**The hunters are coming back to visit Camp Half-Blood! Let's make Artemis and her huntresses feel welcome! Hermes, could you pass the news to Camp?**

_Comments on Upcoming News…: (8)_

_Aphrodite: On no. one…YES! I'm DEFINITELY helping! On no. two…ugh! The hunters! They don't believe in love! 9:00 am_

_Hermes: On number one, I'll help. On number two, sure! 9:02 am_

_Poseidon: On number 1: haha! Everybody but you will be willing to throw this party. I will. You lose, niece. And on number 2: Aphrodite, what do you have against them? And shouldn't you be planning? 9:04 pm_

_Athena: Yes, Aphrodite, if you want this party, you are the one in charge of everything. Go plan! And Poseidon, don't call me 'niece'. Ever. 9:05 am_

_Zeus: I do believe you just got yelled at by your…I won't say niece…how about younger relative? Yeah, you just got yelled at by your younger relative! Ha! And on number one, I'll help. Sorry, daughter. 9:08 am_

_Poseidon: :P 9:09 am_

_Demeter: I'll help! 9:13 am_

_Artemis: Glad you're happy I'm coming. But I can't help because my huntresses need training. Sorry Athena! 9:15 am_

**Today's words of Wisdom! (Quote of the day that will help you to be wiser)**

**Never fall for someone unwilling to catch you. Then, you'll just end up falling on your face and look stupid.**

_Comments on Today's words of Wisdom: (7)_

_Aphrodite: That sounds like it would hurt…and I don't get the point of that. Shouldn't you love everybody? 9:17 am_

_Athena: Yes, you should, but not love, love, like you think. This is why they don't call you the wise one… 9:18 am_

_Persephone: I was unwillingly dragged into hell by an abusive husband. But hey, my vacation is going on now! 9:19_

_Aphrodite: OOOOH. It would STINK to be in your position, Persephone! 9:20_

_Persephone: Yes. It is terrible. 9:21_

_Poseidon: haha. 9:23 am_

_Hades: HEY! 9:24 am  
><span>_

**Finally…**

**A brief story Aphrodite made. THIS IS ALL HERS! I do not take ANY credit for it. She just forgot to post it on her wall yesterday, and now I'm supposedly supposed to put it on MY wall.**

_**It was a warm, sunny day! All the clouds were puffy and bright. Annabeth and Percy were frolicking—wait, that's not like them. Hm. Annabeth and Percy were…walking (!I FOUND A WORD!) together through the strawberry fields, hand in hand. Together, they were talking about bunnies and love and how Athena would NOT appreciate their relationship. **_

_**The End.**_

_**~APH.**_

_Comments on Finally…:(6)_

_Aphrodite: I MADE THAT! YAY! 9:27 am_

_Athena: I cannot believe you made me put that on my wall. 9:30 am_

_Poseidon:…that is a very girlie Percy. O.o 9:31 am_

_Athena: HA! 9:32 am_

_Zeus: Aphrodite, are you feeling okay? That's not like them at all. 9:34 am_

_Aphrodite: I FEEL WOOOOOOOONDERFULLLLL! 9:36 am_

**Athena has logged off, leaving this message:**

**Aphrodite, get back to planning. **

**~Athena, the goddess who will personally kick your butt if you ever mention those words Poseidon did yesterday. **

A/N check the first chapter when Athena's all like 'Poseidon, don't EVER say those words when I am capable of knowing you said them' and blah, blah, blah. I love feedback almost as much as Aphrodite loves love!

~Suzie


	3. Hades' Page

Hey everybody! Here's the newest chapter of _Godbook_…Hades' page today! YAY!

A special thanks to one reviewer, who left me some inspiration. Thanks to another, who said I should incorporate a chapter in which demigods come in. You all are AH-MAY-ZING!

I do not own PJO. I do not own Facebook, which this is merely a rip-off of. (:

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Today on Hades' page…_

**How to get a wife:**

**Threaten her**

**Drag her back**

**If she wants a negotiation, hear her out, or she just might get her mother involved**

**Scare her into coming back with you**

**Make her believe she will be the queen of something**

_Comments on How to get a wife: (7)_

_Persephone: I hate you, Hades. 8:23 pm_

_Hades: Now, Seph, baby… 8:24 pm_

_Persephone: I still hate you. And don't call me Seph. 8:25 pm_

_Aphrodite: HOW CUTE! A love quarrel! 8:26 pm_

_Persephone: I don't love him. I hate him. 8:27 pm._

_Hades: But I love her! 8:28 pm_

_Aphrodite: and I LOVE love! 8:30 pm_

**Tips on how to rule the Underworld**

**Be a cruel, merciless ruler**

**Believe you are the best**

**Act the best**

**BE the best**

**Be better than the best**

**Treat your nephew, Percy Jackson, as the enemy when you are in a bad mood**

**Force a woman to marry you**

**And wait…why am I giving you these tips? I'M the ruler of the Underworld!**

_Comments on Tips on how to rule the Underworld: (14)_

_Demeter: I cannot believe you would publish all this stuff about my daughter! First you made a whole section on her and now you have the nerve to write another part about her? SHE DIDN'T WANT TO MARRY YOU! My baby girl…are you okay? 8:31 pm_

_Persephone: I'm fine, Mother. 8:32 pm_

_Demeter: Would you like some cereal? 8:33 pm_

_Persephone: No, Mother. 8:34 pm_

_Athena: That wasn't wise to publish all of your tips, Uncle. Now others can take over your throne. Just kidding, geez don't you guys have any sense of humor? Wait. Oh My Zeus! 8:35 pm_

_Zeus: What? 8:36_

_Athena: I'm…cousins…with Percy…sort of, not technically because we gods and goddesses do not have Deoxyribonucleic Acid, but think about it. Poseidon is my uncle…and Percy is his son…so…weird…8:37 pm_

_Poseidon: HAHA! 8:38 pm_

_Athena: :P 8:39 pm_

_Zeus: You are correct, daughter, as always, but as you said, we have no DNA so you are not officially related to Percy. I'm sure he sees you…more of a friend than cousin. 8:40_

_Poseidon: Oh, this will be a fun one to tell Annabeth and Percy. 8:41_

_Hades: Hello, can we get back to ME? 8:45 pm_

_Demeter: Don't worry. I'll get back at you. 8:46 pm_

_Hades: ….Demeter… 8:47 pm_

_**Hades has been disconnected because of Mother-in-Law overload. Luckily, we still had his documents to upload so you can comment on the following as well. Hades is expected to be back anywhere between twenty and thirty minutes, after a good payback lesson from Demeter.**_

**Tips on how to agree with the Mother-in-Law**

**The only one: DON'T. GET BACK AT HER!**

_No comments on Tips on how to agree with the Mother-in-Law, for everybody here fears the wrath of Demeter._

**The new style for the Underworld: Aphrodite has backed me up!**

**Ripped black jeans**

**Black converse**

**Red and black shirts**

…**if you can do it, pull off the Mick Jagger look**

_Comments on The new style for the Underworld:…: (5)_

_Aphrodite: YAY! I HELPED WITH THAT! 8:50 pm_

_Athena: Yes, you did, Aphrodite. Enjoy the smart feeling for the moment it lasts. 8:51 pm_

_Aphrodite: THANK YOU, ATHENA! SOMEONE THINKS I'M SMART! 8:52 pm_

_Dionysus: I'm in the mood for some wine right now, anyone want to join? Meet at Camp Half-Blood in your mortal clothing if you do. 8:53 pm_

_Poseidon: I will! It'll be fun to embarrass Annabeth and Percy! 8:54 pm_

_Athena: POSEIDON! Okay…I will too. Just this once. 8:55 pm_

_Back at Camp Half-Blood…._

"Do I look okay? I mean, don't answer that, Poseidon. Do I look like a mortal?" Athena asked, questioning her clothing. She was wearing the tour guide outfit she had worn when she gave Percy a hint, back when he was fourteen and trying to save Annabeth.

Poseidon shrugged. "I don't care, Athena, the campers here will recognize us anyway. `Now, let's go make fun of our kids!"

They put down the wine glasses they drank out of when they visited Dionysus, just a moment ago, and walked off into the training area. It was getting dark, and the campers were beginning to tire and start the bonfire. Percy and Annabeth walked, hand in hand, and suddenly they both stopped and looked up.

"Mom—"

"Dad—" Percy and Annabeth said at the same time.

Athena walked over to the two and took their hands apart. "Annabeth, you know I don't want you holding hands with a son of Poseidon!" Athena scolded, and Poseidon was congratulating his son.

"Way to go, Percy, you got yourself a girlfriend! Oh, and Athena is your cousin!" Poseidon said.

Campers started gathering around, watching Athena scold her child and Poseidon congratulate his son. Percy gaped at the thought of…his girlfriend's mother being his cousin. He knew that wasn't really true, since gods don't have DNA but the thought of it was still weird. Aphrodite girls giggled, while others stood in awe at the sight of two real gods in front of them. Some of the very young ones—only seven or eight—looked like they would pee their pants from being scared of their power.

"Mother, I think you should go now, you're causing quite a scene." Annabeth said, calmer than she's imagined.

"You too, Dad." Percy said.

"That was the point, my dear. Train hard!" Poof! Athena was gone. Poseidon winked to Percy and then poof! He was gone too.

_Back at Olympus…_

"Ha, that was fun!" Athena said.

"I didn't know you could have fun." Poseidon said.

Hermes walked by the two, handing each a duplicate letter. It read:

_Dear Poseidon and Athena,_

_Please never do that again. You caused quite a scene. Have a wonderful Olympus day!_

_Chiron. _

The two laughed. Yeah, Athena didn't know she could have fun either.

_Back on Godbook:_

**Hades has been re-connected. He is done being yelled at by his Mother-in-Law.**

**Hades has now logged-off properly, leaving this message:**

**Never. Insult. Demeter. **

**-Hades, the scared to death (god) of Demeter.**

I know, it was a bit OOC, but hey, I liked it! And yes, Athena and Poseidon were supposed to be a bit OOC for more comedic reasons.

~Suzie


	4. Apollo's Page

Thank you for reviews my lovelies (: A special thanks to Mara, my anon reviewer. Go buy yourself ice cream (:

Do I haveeeeee to say it? .there.

_Welcome Back to Godbook!_

_Apollo's page!_

**Haiku of the day:**

**I am super hot,**

**But not 'cause I'm the sun god,**

**Just 'cause I am me.**

**Thank you.**

_Comments on Haiku of the day: (8)_

_Artemis: Wow, that was bad. 11:34 am_

_Apollo: Well, let's see YOU do one, sister. :P 11:35am_

_Artemis: Okay. I will:  
>I am a goddess;<span>_

_A goddess of the hunters;_

_I will kick your __**We blocked out this offensive word with one syllable. Thank you! ~Server **__ 11:36 am_

_Apollo: O.o where did THAT come from? 11:37 am_

_Athena: I believe Artemis's was, and will always be, better. 11:38 am_

_Apollo: THEN YOU MAKE ONE, OWL FACE! 11:39 am_

_Athena: Okay.  
>I am Athena,<span>_

_I do not have an owl face;_

_I'm smarter than you. 11:40 am_

_Apollo: HMPH. 11:41 am_

**Tips on how to be HAWT!**

**HA! YOU CAN'T BE HOTTER THAN MEEEE!**

**But I'll still let you know some of my secrets.  
>1. Be a haiku MASTER!<strong>

**2. Be the sun god!**

**3. Act all cool around the ladies.**

**4. Dress to impress, never less! OH! That would be a great middle haiku!**

**To be hot, you must:**

**Dress to impress, never less,**

**And act all aloof.**

**Let me see one of YOU write something better than THAT!**

_Comments on Tips on how to be HAWT: (8)_

_Athena: That was super weird.  
>That was very useless too.<br>I think you should stop. 11:42 am_

_Apollo: stop what, dear goddess? |: 11:43 am_

_Aphrodite: Just stop posting stuff! You'll make yourself look like an idiot! Who wants to be known as an idiot? 11:44 am_

_Hephaestus: Aphrodite, dear, you don't need to be worried about him being the idiot god. That position is already taken. 11:45 am_

_Aphrodite: By who? 11:46 am_

_Athena: who_m_, Aphrodite. 11:47_

_Aphrodite: There's a god named whom? 11:48 am_

_Zeus: oh…dear…11:49 am_

**Ways to get the girl: Un-Hades style!**

**Dress to impress, never less! (That's my new saying!)**

**Act aloof.**

**Be aloof.**

**Always complement her even if it's a total lie like: "You look so good!" when she's not wearing any makeup.**

**That is all.**

_Comments on Ways to get the girl: Un-…..(10)_

_Hades: That is insulting. 11:51 am_

_Zeus: Shut it brother. No one likes to hear you talk. 11:52 am_

_Poseidon: HAH! 11:53 am_

_Athena: Apollo! This is VERY offensive! I never wear makeup! Are you calling ME UGLY! 11:54 am_

_Apollo:…yes. 11:55 am_

_Athena: Apollo….11:56 am_

_**Apollo has been disconnected, for Athena's over-yelling. He is expected to be back in about ten minutes after Athena has finished her ranting. Thank you! ~Server**_

_Demeter: That can't be good. 11:59 am_

_Hades: Tell me about it! When you get disconnected by a woman ranting at you…an ugly thing. And I'm not talking about the disconnection. 12:00 pm_

_Demeter: Are you calling me ugly? 12:01 pm_

_Hades: NO! 12:02 pm _

_**We have recovered some of Apollo's documents he was going to post today. Or at least they were in his 'Post Folder' folder. Thank you! ~Server.**_

**I'M A BARBIE GIRL! IN A BARBIE WORLD! I'M MADE OF PLASTIC! ISN'T THAT FANTASTIC? YOU CAN BRUSH MY HAIR AND TAKE ME EVERYWHERE! IMAGINATION, LIFE IS YOUR CREATION! HEHEHEHE! Wait…did I really almost post that. Pssh. I won't now!**

_Comments for I'M A BARBIE GIRL! IN A BARBIE WORLD! I'M MADE OF PLASTIC….:(6)_

_Artemis: O.o 12:04 pm_

_Poseidon: ….12:05 pm._

_Hades: What the—__**We had to block out this offensive word. Thank you! ~Server. **__12:06 pm_

_Demeter: I worry about your brother, Artemis. 12:07 pm_

_Artemis: we all do. Even I, 12:08 pm_

**Apollo is back one minute ahead of planned. Thank you! ~Server**

_Apollo: HOW DID THAT GET THERE? 12:09 pm_

**Song of the month:**

**Rolling in the Deep, ADELE, 21.**

**WE COULD HAVE HAD IT ALL! ROLLING IN THE DEEP!**

_Comments for Song of the month: (9)_

_Aphrodite: I love that song! 12:10 pm_

_Athena: I like it as well. 12:11 pm_

_Artemis: What is it with these mortal women and their songs about men? 12:12 pm_

_Poseidon: Eh. It's okay. Better than most songs now…like that Bieber kid. 12:13 pm_

_Aphrodite: HEY! HE IS CUH-UTE! 12:14 pm._

_Persephone: Guys, cut the kid some slack. At least he RESPECTS women and doesn't write about 'getting' with them like most male singers do. 12:15 pm_

_Hermes: Many people like the Beaver. I do not mind him. 12:17 pm_

_Ares: :P 12:18 pm_

_Apollo: I think that Justin Bieber will be successful. He's not the best singer in the world (that's cause I am) but he's definitely not the worst. 12:19 pm_

**Apollo has logged off, leaving this message/haiku. **

**I am super scared.**

**Do not offend Athena…**

**Or **_**you**_** will be scared.**

**~Apollo, the god who will take running lessons from Hermes in an attempt to avoid getting hurt when offending Athena.**

THERE! Sorry it's sort, but the last one was super long for a godbook page. Up next…HERMES! Oh, and sorry about the random Barbie Girl moment….

To Lukeme the anon reviewer: Thanks for the suggestion! I literally fell backwards from laughing while reading your review! That made my day (:

To forever a mystry another anonymous reviewer: Yes! I'll do Artemis after Hermes!

SO, here's the lineup so far: Aphrodite, Athena, Hades, Apollo.  
>NEXT will be Hermes, Artemis, then Ares, and then Hephaestus. But Lukeme, wouldn't it be Hephaestus who got chucked off Olympus? Either way, your review made me laugh for, like, an hour.<p> 


	5. Herme's Page

Hello, everybody! Chapter five of Godbook, as promised! All the pranks are ones I did with my friends, or my friends told me about and what they did.

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Hermes's page_

**Five pranks to pull at every sleepover **

**5. This is an old one, but it's funny. Put shaving cream or whipped cream on someone's hand when they're sleeping. Tickle their nose and laugh when they look like Santa.**

**4. Put someone's hand in warm water while they're asleep. Don't be surprised when they're all wet. (Those were two classics, now onto ones that are newer)**

**3. Stuff a peep candy down your girlfriend/female friend's bra. Wonder where it went in the morning. (A/N Mel, I'm still confused on how that peep disappeared…)**

**2. Invite a friend/boyfriend/girlfriend over. When they knock on the door, open it and spray them with silly string! (A/N Katrina…how did you think of doing that?)**

**1. Take napkins and soak them in water. Use food coloring to make them red. Roll them up, taping it together on the inside. Then, throw them all over someone's yard…it'll look like used **_**lady necessities**_**. (A/N Wow. My friends are evil for doing/planning these last three pranks.)**

_Comments on Five pranks…(8)_

_Athena: That last one really is quite disgusting. 7:00 am_

_Hermes: I didn't make that prank… 7:01 am_

_Aphrodite: EWWIE! 7:04 am_

_Demeter: that is disturbing! Who wants Lucky Charms? 7:05 am_

_Persephone: Mom! 7:06 am_

_Poseidon: HA! I should do that last one to Annabeth! 7:07 am_

_Athena: You would do no such thing! 7:08 am_

_Hephaestus: okay… 7:09 am_

**Tips on how to be successful in delivering mail**

**NEVER mix up letters from Percy to Annabeth to Athena…it will make it look like Poseidon wrote her a love letter…**

**Never open Demeter's hate mail to Hades. You just might end up with those bad words planted in your mind for good…**

**Don't even bother asking Aphrodite how many love letters she wrote to more than one male. (answer: a lot)**

**Just throw away all of Athena's disapproving letters to Annabeth about how Annabeth is dating "A no good sea spawn of Poseidon" because Annabeth will just throw it away herself.**

**NEVER BRING GEORGE AND MARTHA!**

_Comments on How to be successful in del…: (10)_

_Athena: On no. one, that was HORRIBLE Hermes, and on no. four, really? I need to have a chat with Annabeth…that is just so disrespectful to throw away mail from your mother! 7:10 am_

_Demeter: I know, Athena, I feel your pain. Persephone throws away all my letters as well. And Hermes, that is a good tip ;) I use some pretty strong words at Hades. 7:11 am_

_Aphrodite: Yay! I was in that! Yay! And yes, don't ask! The number is higher than even Athena can count! 7:12 am_

_Athena: trust me, I've tried. 7:13 am_

_Aphrodite: OH, AND EVERYBODY! I HAVE A QUESTION! On Apollo's Page Athena said there was a god named whom. Has anybody even MET this guy? 7:14 am_

_Athena: Aphrodite, I was just correcting your grammar. There is no god named whom. 7:15 am_

_Poseidon: HEY! Why would I write…eww…a __**love **__letter to that owl face? 7:16 pm_

_George&Martha-the-eternal-snakes: Hey! 7:17 pm_

_Hermes: Sorry, guys, you just annoy the underworld out of me. 7:18 pm_

_Hades: even I fear Demeter and her strong words. 7:19 pm_

**Tips for traveling:**

**DRIVING: don't fall asleep**

**RIDING AN AIRPLANE: don't, if you're Percy.**

**TRAIN: just don't jump out…**

**Centaur: You know, actually, forget that one was even mentioned. **

_Comments for: Tips for traveling: :(4) _

_Poseidon: Centaur? That would end badly. 7:19 pm_

_Zeus: Percy better stay out of the sky. That's MY territory. You don't see Thalia swimming in the ocean every day, or Nico flying! There's a reason for that! 7:20 pm_

_Athena: Father, calm down! 7:21 pm_

_Hades: Hehe. Your daughter just yelled at you. 7:22 pm_

**Hermes has logged off to go deliver mail, leaving this message:**

**-Hermes, the god who promises Athena she will never get one of Percy's love letters to Annabeth again.**

A/N Hey guys! I know it's short, and this is NOT my best chapter, but I just wanted to update! Any ideas for Artemis? Love ya!

~Suzie


	6. Artemis' Page

WOW! You guys are awesome (: I just had to update ASAP. I just had to use almost ALL of the ideas! THANK YOU SO MUCH! Sorry if I forget to thank you (:

_Welcome to Godbook! _

_Artemis's Page_

**Reasons why Apollo annoys me (Thanks to .4ever)**

**He claims to be older**

**He calls me 'lil' sis'**

**He SUCKS at using a bow and arrow, compared to me**

**He's a BOY!**

**He LOVES people in the **_**lovey dovey **_**way**

**He can't make a haiku to save his life. Not a good one, anyway.**

_Comments on Reasons why Apollo annoys me: (6)_

_Apollo: Harsh. 12:45 pm_

_Athena: Apollo claims to be older? 12:46 pm_

_Poseidon: Hey, I'm a boy! 12:47 pm_

_Artemis: Another reason to hate you. What do boys do? They claim to 'fall in love' then knock up the girl he 'loves' the leaves! You, Poseidon, are the PERFECT example on that. 12:48 pm_

_Poseidon: Hey! Do not get Percy involved in this! 12:49 pm_

_Artemis: I wasn't talking about just Percy. I was talking about all your kids. 12:50 pm_

**Ways to seek revenge on males (thanks to the no-named reviewer)**

**Turn them into small, helpless animals**

**Shoot them with a bow and arrow**

**Kill that mortal they 'love'**

_Comments on Ways to seek revenge on males: (6)_

_Aphrodite: Why would you kill the mortal that they love? That idea makes me sad :( 12:52 pm_

_Artemis: That is the point. We must stop these silly mortal girls from falling for stupid boys 12:53 pm_

_Poseidon: Boys aren't stupid. Are you calling me stupid? 12:54 pm_

_Artemis: Yes. 12:55 pm_

_Poseidon: Percy? 12:56 pm_

_Artemis: Yes. 12:57 pm_

**Ways girls are superior to boys: (Thanks to I'mDifferent-GetOverIt and the no named reviewer)**

**-We girls are more agile, making fights less sloppy.**

**-We are more talented.**

**-Because Apollo is a boy.**

**-Because we. Just. Are.**

_Comments on Ways girls are superior to b…(4)_

_Athena: Women are better, we tend to be more logical and wise. 12:58 pm_

_Aphrodite: I'm glad I'm a girl! 12:59 pm_

_Zeus: You're calling the male population dumb? 1:00 pm_

_Apollo: No, she's just calling me dumb. 1:01 pm_

**HOW TO BECOME A HUNTER! (Thanks to ThatSuperHotSexyBookWorm)**

**-just vow to Artemis (me) that you will stay loyal to being a virgin, and you can become a huntress! You will fight monsters with me, battle evil people, and so much more!**

_Comments on How to become a hunter: (6)_

_Poseidon: Hey, Athena, you should join! Oh wait, you BROKE YOUR VOW TO BE A VIRGIN! You had Annabeth :P 1:02 pm_

_Athena: Poseidon, she's a brain child. She was born through thoughts. I don't break vows. 1:03 pm_

_Artemis: She's right, and only she can do that, because she is the wisdom goddess. 1:04 pm_

_Poseidon: Shut up.1:05 pm_

_Apollo: Sister, what do you have against males? 1:06 pm_

_Artemis: Everything. 1:07 pm_

**Why males are bad/repulsive: (Thanks to Wisegirl1313)**

**-They are immature**

**-if they are gods, they claim that they love mortal women only to end up knocking them up and leaving them with the kid(s)!**

**-Boys (HERMES) play pranks & never take us MATURE women seriously**

**-They aren't jackalopes **

**-Apollo is one. Case closed.**

_Comments on Why males are bad/repuls…(10)_

_Aphrodite: Boys are cute! 1:09 pm_

_Athena: Boys aren't wise. 1:10 pm_

_Zeus: I am wise! 1:11 pm_

_Athena: Of course you are. 1:12 pm_

_Apollo: WHAT DO YOU HAVE AGAINST ME? 1:13 pm_

_Artemis: JUST SCROLL BACK UP OR I'LL HAVE TO GIVE YOU A HOUR LECTURE! 1:14 pm_

_Hestia: Guys…um, please do not fight…1:15 pm_

_Athena: Hello, Hestia. Glad you've made an account. 1:16 pm_

_Hestia: Thank you, Lady Athena. 1:17 pm_

_Apollo: Yeah, Artemis, don't start fights :P 1:18 pm_

**(For this next one, thanks to softball girl)**

**UGH! APHRODITE….! FINE!  
>Aphrodite 'forgot' to upload this on her page, so she's making ME put this…atrocity up.<br>In the words of Aphrodite: "Artemis just doesn't know love. Love is sooooooo CUTE! What does she have against it?"  
>Aphrodite, love is just not the answer to everything.<strong>

_Comments on UGH! APHRODITE….! FI…(3)_

_Athena: I hate when she 'forgets' to upload things. 1:20 pm_

_Aphrodite: ! 1:21 pm_

_Hermes: haha. 1:22 pm_

**WILL EVERYONE JUST PLEASE STOP TALKING ABOUT PERCY AND ANNABETH? (Thanks to Eleos)**

_Comments on Artemis's disapproval of Annabeth and Percy dating: (5)_

_Aphrodite: NEVER! 1:23 pm_

_Athena: I would like there to be less talk, but if that is what my daughter chooses, then surely people will talk about her lack of thinking. 1:25 pm_

_Apollo: Why? I made a haiku about them. 1:26 pm_

_Dionysus: I'm—sadly—making their wine for their wedding in future years. Aphrodite tricked me into swearing it on the Styx. 1:28 pm_

_Aphrodite: I DID! (: 1:30 pm_

**Artemis has signed off, leaving this message:**

**r%3m!$, the goddess who hates relationships.**


	7. Ares' Page

Hello! Sorry I haven't updated in a while, but things have been hectic. School's just ended, my Aunt is in town, and there's a wedding I have to prep for. Anyway, read, review, and ENJOY!

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Ares' Page_

**How to be good with the ladies: (Thanks to I'mDifferent-GetOverIt aka Different)**

**-Act cool**

**-Be me**

**-Have nice abs**

**-Play sports in front of her**

**-Always show off**

**-Be strong**

**-Be the god of War**

**-Just don't flirt with Aphrodite. She's MINE.**

_Comments on How to be good with the la….(8)_

_Zeus: I don't need these tips. I'M THE FREAKING RULER OF THE GODS, BABY! That's an advantage right there ;) 5:09 pm_

_Hera: Off having affairs, again, Zeus? Gods __**We had to block this offensive word that starts with 'D', thank you! ~Server**__ Zeus! The last time that happened, you ended up with triplets with some slutty woman! 5:10 pm_

_Athena: Father, why must you be unwise? You have a wife, and you should stay loyal to her. 5:11 pm_

_Hera: THANK YOU, Athena. 5:12 pm_

_Zeus: HEY! Athena, without my 'affair', you wouldn't be here. 5:13 pm_

_Athena: Oh, I'd show up one way or another. 5:14 pm_

_Aphrodite: Love you too, Sweetie! 5:17 pm_

_Ares: ;) 5:18 pm_

**How to get ripped (again, thanks to Different)**

**-Be the god of War—you get lots of training**

**-Lift weights**

**-Hang out with the people of Sparta**

**-Fight people**

**-Sword Fighting**

**-Training**

_Comments on How to get ripped: (8)_

_Hermes: Or you could deliver heavy mail bags all day. 5:20 pm_

_Zeus: Or throw lightning bolts. 5:21 pm_

_Ares: My tips work, too, you know. 5:23 pm_

_Athena: Why do men insist on being the toughest guy around? Why can't they have brains, for once, instead of brawns? What is so terrible about being wise and strategizing before an attack? No, men just insist on being strong and they think everything will work out for them! WELL, it doesn't! 5:26 pm_

_Aphrodite: Try lifting my heavy mirrors everyday! That REALLY is a workout! And moving my clothing racks, and rearranging my makeup and perfumes! 5:27 pm_

_Athena: Oh, you have a _terrible _life, Aphrodite! Lifting mirrors and rearranging perfume? That must be _horrible_. 5:29 pm_

_Aphrodite: It is! OMGods! SOMEONE finally gets it! 5:30 pm_

_Ares: I believe you, Sweetie. 5:31 pm_

**Tips for picking a fight: (Thanks again, Different!)**

**-Say stuff like:**

**-"What, Punk?"**

**-"You flirting with my lady?"**

**-"What? You think you're better than me?"**

**-"Why? You afraid I'll beat you up?"**

**-"Oh, go crying home to mommy,"**

**-Act all tough**

**-Claim you're better than them. WAY better**

_Comments on Tips for picking a fight: (5)_

_Athena: Why would you WANT to start a fight? It's unwise. 5:34 pm_

_Zeus: I AM THE RULER OF THE GODS! No one will dare mess with me. 5:35 pm_

_Artemis: Boys are animals, Athena. We should just let them be. Plus, I'm not allowed turning the gods into jackalopes.5:36 pm_

_Hera: Oh, I'll pick fights alright. But not with these tips, my disgrace of a son. 5:37 pm_

_Ares: What? Mommy, why am I a disgrace? THAT'S NOT FAIRRRRRR! 5:38 pm_

**How to be awesome (Thanks to LukeMe)**

**-Be me**

**-Get a hot chick**

**-Don't be Hades**

**-Don't be Apollo**

**-Really, don't be ANY of the other gods. Just me**

**-Don't get chucked off Olympus by your mother.**

**-Don't be crippled like your brother**

**-Don't be your brother**

_Comments on How to be awesome: (12)_

_Hephaestus: Hey! It's not my fault my mother chucked me off of Olympus. But the prank I pulled on her with the chair…haha. Priceless. 5:40 pm_

_Hera: Don't make me chuck you off again. 5:41 pm_

_Demeter: You can be awesome by growing cereal! 5:42 pm_

_Persephone: Mother…you know what, forget it. 5:43 pm_

_Demeter: Anyone want cereal? 5:44 pm_

_Everyone: NO! 5:45 pm_

_Demeter: Sheesh. More for me! 5:46 pm_

_Ares: I got my hot chick. (: Lawls. 5:47 pm_

_Aphrodite: Oh, Ares, you flatter me so. 5:48 pm_

_(I'm not a Pothena fan, but this next comment is for Alice)_

_Poseidon: Athena, will you be my hot chick? 5:49 pm_

_Athena: Go away, Poseidon. Go knock up some mortal or something. 5:50 pm_

_Ares: OOOHHH! BURN! 5:51 pm_

**How to do good in War (I actually came up with this one..haha)**

**-Train**

**-Be buff**

**-Show off**

**-Distract the enemy**

**-We live in Olympus, now located in America. As said in Night at the Museum : Battle of the Smithsonian (which Athena made me watch, saying it had some educational value that would 'help me'), "WE ARE AMERICANS! WE DON'T PLAN! WE JUST DO!**

_Comments on How to do good in war: (6)_

_Athena: I regret making you watch that movie. You ALWAYS have to plan. Stupid general. Do you want to be like him and lead 208 people to their deaths? 5:53 pm_

_Ares:….yes. It'd be funny watching them plead for their puny mortal lives. 5:54 pm_

_Aphrodite: Ares! That's horrible! What if they had a family and loved ones? 5:55 pm_

_Ares: Aph, babe, it was a joke…5:56 pm_

_Aphrodite: I'm mad at you. Our date is OFF! 5:57 pm_

_Zeus: You just got burned. 5:59 pm_

**Ares has logged off, leaving this message:**

**Never say you want to kill someone near Aphrodite. Lesson Learned.**

**-Ares, the god who doesn't get a date tonight.**

A/N It's kind of short, I know, but please review! I love feedback almost as much as Aphrodite loves love! I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Up next: Hephaestus. I'd LOVE any ideas you guys have for him (: I'll try to incorporate them all!

I Wish You All Wisdom,

~Suzie


	8. Hephaestus's Page

Hey! Welcome back to Godbook! Thanks to everybody who suggested ideas. I tried to make them all work, but some were difficult. Anyway, thank you all for the GREAT ideas!

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Hephaestus's Page_

**How to trap a devious wife (Thanks to Different)**

**-Set up traps every where she goes on dates with other men**

**-Fool her into believing you're doing something for her**

**-Trap her in nets**

_Comments on How to trap a devious wife: (8)_

_Aphrodite: I'm flattered that you would make a WHOLE segment for me, but, like, seriously, like, don't ever, like, do that to me again. 8:23 pm_

_Hephaestus: I think I will. 8:24 pm_

_Athena: I'm sure you have other strategies, as well, but if you ever need another, just ask. I'd like to show Aphrodite how unwise it is to cheat on her husband. 8:25 pm_

_Aphrodite: I THOUGHT WE WERE BGFFOILs! 8:27 pm_

_Athena: What? 8:28 pm_

_Aphrodite: Best Goddess Friends For Our Immortal Lives, duh. 8:29 pm_

_Athena: We are friends, Aphrodite, but it is unwise for you to cheat on Hephaestus. You just end up getting screwed. And NOT in the dirty way, the "Oh, I'm screwed," kind of screwed. You know what I mean. I know what I mean like the kind where you're playing that mortal Xbox or whatever and you are about to die and people say "I'm screwed," or "You're screwed". 8:31 pm_

_Aphrodite: I honestly did not understand a word of that. 8:32 pm_

**How to make the love goddess your wife: (thanks to Forever a mystry)**

**-Make her shiny things (she loves them)**

**-Guess her dress size one lower than it really is (so, guess negative four)**

**-Complement her ****no matter what****.**

**-Always agree with her about love and fashion and tell her that pink makes her look more like a love goddess**

**-Pester her with questions while giving her electronics until she says yes**

_Comments on How to make the love goddess you…(9)_

_Aphrodite: OHHH! SHINY! PINK! SHINY! 8:35 pm_

_Ares: Pink is a girly color. Why not wear red, or black for once? 8:36 pm_

_Hephaestus: If the lady likes pink, she gets PINK. 8:37 pm_

_Aphrodite: Awwwww, thank you Hephie! 8:38 pm_

_Hera: She's too good for you anyways. Why do you still try, my disgrace of a son? 8:39 pm_

_Hephaestus: Oh, I gave up. But if I don't stand up for her…it ends badly. 8:40 pm_

_Demeter: Pink is good, but green is better! Green colors the earth! And it's a color on cereal boxes, sometimes! 8:41 pm_

_Persephone: Mother! Will you ever give up on this cereal thing? 8:42 pm_

_Hades: I hope she does. 8:43 pm_

**How to deal with a cheating wife: (Again, thanks to Forever a mystry)**

**-Prank her and Ares and film her so it embarrasses her**

**-Limit the amount of things she can take from you**

**-Get Athena and Artemis to lecture her about it until she falls asleep (Hestia will help sometimes to, to prevent fighting)**

**-Lock her up so she can't sneak away to see him for a few weeks**

**-Take away her perfume**

**-Take away her makeup**

**-If she's Aphrodite...none of this may work.**

_Comments on How to deal with a cheating wife: ()_

_Aphrodite: It's not my fault I was FORCED to marry him. Stupid Zeus 8:44 pm_

_Zeus: Well, it seems that my in genius plan failed, anyway. 8:45 pm_

_Hephaestus: What's wrong with me? 8:46 pm_

_Aphrodite: Short list or long list? 8:47 pm_

_Hephaestus: Long…8:48 pm_

_Athena: Oh great, now you've doomed us all. 8:49 pm_

_Aphrodite: You're crippled, your own mother hates you, you smell like metal, your beard needs trimmed, you look like an animal, you were named a disgrace and thrown off of Olympus, you can never compete with your brother, Ares, all you want to ever do is make a new invention, you trapped the QUEEN of the GODS, and YOU TOOK AWAY MY FAVORITE ETERNAL GRACE PERFUME! And there's even more. 8:54 pm _

_Hades: HAHA! Persephone has a shorter list of why she hates me. SO I'M NOT THE GOD THAT EVERYBODY HATES! YAY! 8:55 pm_

_Aphrodite:…YAY! 8:56 pm_

**How to lose your wife to a biker: (Thanks to Eleos)**

**-There's no tips. You just do…**

_Comments on How to lose your wife to a bik….(4)_

_Ares: Haha! I WIN HEPPPIEE! LAWLZ! 8:57 pm_

_Aphrodite: Hehehe. I love you, Ares! 8:58 pm_

_Hephaestus: Whatever. I accepted that a loooooong time ago. 8:59 pm_

_Ares: LAWLZ! LAWLZ! LAWLZ! LAWLZ! LAWLZ! LAWLZ! 9:00 pm_

**How to get back at people& the BEST inventions: These are ways to get back at exes, cheaters, and mothers. (Thanks to Cupcake Ninja918 for the how to get back at people & the best inventions & softballgirlsister for the get back at exes, cheaters, and mothers.)**

**-THE CHAIR! (Cause once, I had this awesome chair and Hera sat in it and I got back at her by making the chair trap her! That was fun)**

**-The Cupid Cam thing (remember? I had that to trap Aphrodite and Ares, but ended up having Annabeth and Percy fall for it)**

_Comments on How to get back at people& th…(6)_

_Athena: Hephaestus! I cannot believe…UGH! Why bring it up? It was bad enough for my daughter to be with that Sea Spawn in the Tunnel of LOVE, but you still mention it? WHY! 9:02 pm_

_Poseidon: Wow, is it your time of the month, Athena? 9:03 pm_

_Athena: I cannot believe the male gender! 9:04 pm_

_Artemis: Neither can I, Athena, neither can I. 9:05 pm_

_Hephaestus: Calm down, Athena. It was just a joke. 9:06 pm_

_Athena: You better hope it was just a joke. 9:07 pm_

**Latest inventions: (thanks to Eleos, again)**

**-Net to trap Ares & Aphrodite**

**-Chair to trap Mom**

**-Leo's invention, Festus, the dragon (who sadly…er, departed from us)**

**-Hephaestus TV**

**-Cupid Cam**

_Comments on Latest Inventions: (12)_

_Hera: I cannot believe you did that to me! You will pay for that…AGAIN! 9:09 pm_

_Hephaestus: Yeah, yeah. Whatever. You always say that. 9:10 pm_

_Aphrodite: Why do you HAVE to trap ME? 9:11 pm_

_Hephaestus: Because you cheat on me. 9:12 pm_

_Aphrodite: I didn't choose to marry you. 9:13 pm_

_Athena: I never really liked the Cupid Cam. I didn't need to see my daughter flirting with my old rival's son. 9:14 pm_

_Poseidon: So, we don't hate each other now? Does that mean we can go out one time soon? ;) 9:15 pm __(again, that comment was for Alice, who requested more Pothena.)_

_Athena: No, Poseidon, we still hate each other. But we're not rivals…just for the sake of our children. And why don't you go ask some slut to go out with you? Maybe then, you'll actually 'get some' for once. 9:18 pm_

_Ares: Dude, you just got burned AGAIN! Go Athena! 9:19 pm_

_Poseidon: Whatever. 9:20 pm_

**Hephaestus had logged off, leaving this message: (Thanks to silverwingedangel94)**

**Hera is an old cow.**

**-Hephaestus, the god who should probably sleep with one eye open tonight after what he just said about Hera.**

Well, there you have it; chapter eight. Okay, I need all of your opinions. I've been thinking about making a new story (don't worry, I'd still update this one) about the gods. Anyway, some of them would always be fighting like mortal teenagers. Zeus wants it to stop, but it doesn't. As a punishment, they get sent to a high school to see what it's like to be a real teenager. What would you think about that? If it's a yes, then I'd need ALL of you to give me feedback if I make it, because I, first of all, love to have pointers and tips, and second of all, am not sure about that story.

Oh, and Poseidon is the next chapter. I'd love some ideas!

I love feedback _almost _as much as Aphrodite loves love.

~Suzie


	9. Poseidon's Page

OMG! So sorry for the late update! First my little cousin came and I had to go to the pool with her, then my grandma came up, then I had to go to a wedding, and then I had to take my grandma back and stay there for three days. Whew. Anyway, here is chapter nine!

I don't own PJO

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Poseidon's Page_

**How to deal with Athena for over 3,000 years **

**-Train your mind to block out her voice**

**-Train yourself to fall asleep during her lectures**

**-Bother her, it's amusing**

**-Pretend she doesn't exist**

**-Make jokes/rude remarks about her**

_Comments on How to deal with Athena for o…:(8) _

_Athena: I hate you. 4:32 pm_

_Poseidon: I hate you too. 4:33 pm_

_Aphrodite: Aww! You two would make a great couple! 4:36 pm_

_Persephone: A better one than Hades and I. 4:37 pm_

_Demeter: Well you shouldn't have ate the pomegranate! 4:38 pm_

_Hades: HA! HA! I WIN! 4:39 pm_

_Demeter: You'll lose your life if you say that again. 4:40 pm_

_Hades: Yes Ma'am. 4:41 pm_

**How to anger your brothers, Zeus and Hades **

**-Claim that Sea beats the Underworld and Sky any day**

**-Throw fish at them**

**-Turn them into small, helpless sea creatures**

_Comments on How to anger your brothers, Ze…:(6)_

_Zeus: I really hated being a baby clownfish. Don't do that again. 4:43 pm_

_Hades: He made me a female angel fish! AN ANGEL FISH! That really hurt my masculinity. 4:44 pm_

_Aphrodite: Masculinity? What's that? 4:45 pm_

_Demeter: Something Hades doesn't have. 4:46 pm_

_Aphrodite: OOOOHHHH. Hehehe. 4:47 pm_

_Zeus: I hate fish. 4:48 pm_

**How to become Master of the SEA! **

**-Be AWESOME! (Check!)**

**-Be a fish-ruling lord! (Check!)**

**-Be ME! (DOUBLE CHECK!)**

**-Get all the lady fish & mermaids to fall for you. (Heh…CHECK!)**

_Comments on How to become a Master of t…:(6)_

_Athena: Pssh, the only lady who likes you is Amphitrite. 4:52 pm_

_Poseidon: Sally likes me! 4:53 pm_

_Athena: Then why is she married to Paul Blofis? 4:54 pm_

_Poseidon: Heh heh…Blowfish…heh heh. 4:55 pm_

_Aphrodite: EWW! Blowfish are, like, ugly and FAT! 4:56 pm_

_Ares: They are fat. Then skinny. Then all fat again. And it has spiky hair. It's a punk fish. 4:57 pm_

**Tips on how to try to convince Percy to not date a child of that Smart Aleck of a goddess: **

**-Tell him that there are other fish in the Sea (get it? Ruler of the Sea…)**

**-Tell him how annoying Athena is **

**-Beg**

**-Beg**

**-Beg some more**

**-If he still refuses…just make sure your other children (esp. Triton) don't make that mistake**

_Comments on Tips on how to try to convince Percy to n…:(10)_

_Ranting-Athena Athena: WHAT? MISTAKE? MY DAUGHTER IS NOT A GIRL IN A 'MISTAKE' RELATIONSHIP! I LEARNED TO ACCEPT IT! NOW YOU MUST TOO! 5:00 pm_

_Artemis: Ugh. Relationships. Blech. 5:02 pm_

_Aphrodite: HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT? 5:03 pm_

_Zeus: As long as it's not Thalia with that Gothic boy like all those mortals predict to happen, then I'm fine with it.5:04 pm_

_Aphrodite: AWW, but ZEUS! They're CUTE together! 5:05 pm_

_Artemis: BUT. SHE'S. A. HUNTER! 5:06 pm_

_Aphrodite: SO! They can still work out! (: 5:07 pm_

_Zeus: They better not! 5:08 pm_

_Hades: THEY BETTER NOT! 5:09 pm_

_Zeus: I just said that. 5:10 pm_

**Ways to win a swimming race **

**-Be the sea god**

**-Be a son or daughter of a sea god**

**-When you race, make a trail of bubbles to push your forward to make you go faster**

**-Make an air bubble to breathe**

**-Grow fins. Oh wait, only I can do that. And it would be too noticeable…**

_Comments on ways to win a swimming race: (17)_

_Athena: All of those ways are cheating! 5:13 pm_

_Poseidon: Yeah, yeah, whatever Owl Face. 5:14 pm_

_Hades: There's only one problem with this. ONLY YOU CAN DO THAT CRAP! 5:15 pm_

_Poseidon: I know. I just like rubbing it in. 5:16 pm_

_Demeter: Whatever. I can grow awesome plants! 5:17 pm_

_Aphrodite: I can curse love lives! 5:18 pm_

_Poseidon: What can Athena do? Huh? NOTHING! 5:19 pm_

_Athena: I beg to differ. I can strategize your death in the most painful, excruciating way. It will all be on blueprints where I will hang on my wall. I can gather the supplies to kill you, and burn your dead body. I will bury those ashes, dig them up, step on them, burn them again, step on them, bury them, dig them up, set them to fire one last time, and then have the wind blow them away, scattering all over the earth. People will find those ashes, and then step on them. Those ashes will travel the world in the wind, and I will make sure that they come back so I can bury them and step on their grave. 5:24 pm_

_Poseidon: O.o 5:25 pm_

_All the Gods and Goddesses: Wooooowwwww. 5:26 pm_

_Athena: I can also strategize and plan wars, share my wisdom with the world, and much, much more. But the 'kill you' thing just makes me seem like a bad__**We had to block this 'A' word. Thank you! ~Server**__ 5:27 pm_

_Zeus: Oooohhhhkaayyyy….my daughter has officially gone crazy. 5:28 pm_

_**Athena has to go lay down with some ice on her forehead, by request of Zeus. You may now start celebrating. Thank you! ~Server 5:29 pm**_

_Poseidon: YES! SHE'S GONE! WHOOOOOOOOO! 5:31 pm_

_Aphrodite: Boo! She's my BGFFOIL! GRRRRR! 5:32 pm_

_Ares: Calm down, Babe. Athena will be back tomorrow. Then you can…do whatever it is you girls do. 5:33 pm_

_Aphrodite: YAYYYY! 5:34 pm_

**How to get Athena mad at you: **

**-Mention Percy and Annabeth doing…naughty things**

**-Say that Percy is dating another girl, and broke up with her 'perfect' daughter, Annabeth**

**-Tell her she's unwise**

**-Say owls are stupid, rat eating animals**

**-Say controlling water is more important than planning**

_Comments on How to get Athena mad at yo…: ()_

_Athena's Owl: she would yell at you. But imma gonna take a snooze. 5:37 pm_

_Demeter: I think your rivalry has gone far enough. This has gone on for thousands of years! Just let it go and make up with her! 5:38 pm_

_Hades: Hypocrite! 5:39 pm_

_Demeter: Go away, Hades. 5:40 pm_

_Zeus: Where's Poseidon? 5:41 pm_

**Poseidon is playing Seaville right now. Please do not disturb him.**

**This is his sign out:**

**My saltwater spring SO beat Athena's stupid tree.**

**-Poseidon, the god in hiding from Athena **

A/N Thanks to:

C-Nuggets N.L.

Eleos

Redwaves9

Percy-jacksons-number-1-fan

HermesPotter

There! I hope you enjoyed! Up next: ZEUS! I'd LOVE ideas!


	10. Sorry about thatZeus's Page

_A/N Wow! So many ideas! I used as many as I could think of for tips to put underneath (: So, I'm sorry I didn't use your idea, but I stilled love all of the ideas! Thanks guys, so, so, SO very much! You are all the best. THANK YOU TO ALL WHO REVIEWED/GAVE IDEAS! Godbook would crash & burn without your ideas, fanfiction reviewers! End A/N_

|\/|/\|\/|/\|

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Zeus's Page_

**Why My Children Are SOOOO Much BETTER Than YOURS**

**-Thalia is the prime example. Nothing is cooler than her**

**-They can zap people with lightning!**

**-Perseus (NOT that Jackson one) is one of the very, very, VERY few heroes to have a happy(ish) ending and not die a painful death**

**-Thalia can singe off your eyebrows…haha**

_Comments on Why My Children Are SOOOO Much BET…. : (12)_

_Poseidon: Hey! Percy is having a very happy life. With that Annabeth girl. Let's hope she doesn't die. 3:13 pm_

_Athena: Don't talk about my daughter like that! 3:14 pm_

_Zeus: Are you feeling better now, my favorite child? 3:15_

_Athena: Yes, Father. I was fine before. I was just ranting. 3:16 pm_

_Poseidon: Ranting…more like killing my masculinity. 3:17 pm_

_Athena: For the last time: YOU HAVE NONE! 3:18 pm_

_Ares: Ohh, BURN, DUDE! SHE'S ON A ROLL! *virtually high-fives Athena 3:19 pm_

_Aphrodite: Is there a masculinity for girls? 3:20 pm_

_Athena: That's called femininity. 3:21 pm_

_Aphrodite: Do I have that? 3:22 pm_

_Athena: Umm, yes? All women have femininity. It's masculinity for women. 3:33 pm_

_Zeus: LET'S GET BAK TO ME! 3:34 pm_

**Why Thalia is better than Nico**

**-She's MY daughter**

**-He's all depressing**

**-He's HADES' son.**

**-She can zap people and brag about her father being THE RULER of the WORLD!**

**-All He can do is 'shadow travel' and talk to dusty dead people.**

**-Therefore, they should NEVER date **

_Comments on Why Thalia is better than Nico: (8)_

_Hades: I am offended! 3:36 pm_

_Aphrodite: Me too! 3:37 pm_

_Hades: Why are you offended? 3:38 pm_

_Aphrodite: Because I decide who is 'with' who and who LOVES who! NOT ZEUS! 3:39 pm_

_Ares: Calm down, babe, or I'll have to take away your Eternal Grace again. _(Read my story Punishment to get it)_and you hate when I do that! 3:40 pm_

_Aphrodite: You wouldn't dare! 3:41 pm_

_Ares: Calm down. It was a joke….  
>…or was it? 3:42 pm<span>_

_Zeus: Well, WHAT I SAY GOES! I AM THE FREAKING RULER, BABY! HAHA! 3:44 pm_

**How to force a goddess into marrying you: UN-HADES WAY**

**-See her, fall in love with her, and turn into a cuckoo**

**-When she sees how cold you are as a little cuckoo, she will bring you inside**

**-Show your true form**

**-Eh…I won't mention this part**

**-Take her to a real place to get married! **

_Comments on How to force a goddess into marrying you: UN-…. : (9)_

_Hera: And after all of that, you cheat on me with every slut out there. 3:46 pm_

_Zeus: HEY! Mrs. Grace was NOT a slut! 3:47 pm_

_Hera: She was a drunk. 3:48 pm_

_Zeus:….shut up. 3:49 pm_

_Aphrodite: Oh, Hera, lighten up! Love is AMAZING! 3:50 pm_

_Hera: It's YOUR fault he fell for all those mortals, Aphrodite, because of your stupid little LOVE! 3:52 pm_

_Athena: Hera, be wise about this. Think it over. Without Zeus, you wouldn't have a perfect step-daughter like me! 3:53 pm_

_Hera: And the world would rejoice. 3:54 pm_

_Poseidon: HEY! IT IS __**MY**__ JOB TO MAKE MEAN COMMENTS ABOUT ATHENA! NOT YOURS! 3:55 pm_

**How to keep the MASTER BOLT! away from demigods**

**-Swat their hands when they try to take it**

**-Unleash your rage on their godly parent, threatening a war**

**-Say if you don't have it back war will incase the world, with nowhere to run to**

_Comments on How to keep the MASTER BOLT! away from… : (8)_

_Poseidon: I remember that. 3:56 pm_

_Athena: Not good times! War is NOT the answer1 3:57 pm_

_Ares: You're right, Athena. 3:58 pm_

_Athena: Thank You. 3:59 pm_

_Ares: War is NEVER the answer. 4:00 pm_

_Poseidon: The god of WAR is saying this? 4:01 pm_

_Ares: You didn't let me finish. War is the QUESTION, the answer is YES! So, war isn't the answer, the answer is yes. 4:02 pm_

_Athena: I'm surrounded my imbeciles. 4:03 pm_

**THALICO WIL NEVER HAPPEN, APHRODITE! **

_Comments: (1)_

_Aphrodite: ZEUS! I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU WOULD SAY THAT! I AM THE GODDESS OF LOVE, SO WHEN IT COMES TO LOVE I MAKE THE DECISIONS! NOT YOU! YOU ARE NOT THE GOD OF LOVE! I AM THE GODDESS OF LOVE AND BEAUTY, TWO THINGS THALIA HAS! Although, she could be a little more girly, BUT THAT IS BESIDE THE POINT! THALOA AND NICO WILL BE THE SECOND PERCY AND ANNABETH! Although Percy and Annabeth are so original and amazing BUT AGAIN THAT IS BESIDE THE POINT! LOVE IS WHAT I SAY! NOT YOU! AND I SAY THAT LOVE WILL PREVAIL FOR THALICO!  
>4:10 PM<span>_

_Nobody else has commented, for fear that Aphrodite will curse their love lives if they disagree with her._

**How to seriously tick off your brothers**

**-Say sky beats sea and the underworld any day**

**-Get your children to take their stuff**

**-Make fun of their ruling areas**

_Comments on How to seriously tick off your brothers: (7)_

_Athena: It's not wise to send your children to take your brothers' items. There could be a war! 4:13 pm_

_Zeus: Whatever. 4:14 pm_

_Poseidon: For the LAST time! I DID NOT SEND PERCY TO TAKE YOUR BOLT! IT WAS ALL LUKE! 4:15 pm_

_Hermes: And he was such a good kid before… 4:16_

_Aphrodite: And he could've had SO MANY RELATIONSHIPS! ),: 4:17 pm_

_Athena: He was a fair strategizer. 4:18 pm_

_Zeus: Oh, whatever, he flirted with my DAUGHTER! 4:19 pm_

_Aphrodite: And it was SOOO cute! But Thalico is WAYYYYY better! 4:20 _

**How to scare demigods**

**-Be me**

**-Zap them with lightning**

**-Threaten that if they flirt with your daughter, they will be zapped (literally) to Tartarus**

**-Threaten to singe their eyebrows off**

_Comments on How to scare demigods: (3)_

_Poseidon: None of us can do these things. 4:24 pm_

_Athena: I can threaten them that if they touch my daughter they will go to the underworld sooner than the fates have planned. It worked with Percy quite nicely. Eh, but they fell in love, so that plan is useless now. 4:25 pm_

_Zeus: I CAN DO ALL OF THE ABOVE! YAY! 4:26 pm_

**How to make Hera not cheat on me  
><strong>

**-Threaten to turn her into an ant and squash her**

**-Throw away all of her things**

**-Slap her silly until she promises not too**

_Comments on How to make Hera not cheat on me: (3)_

_Hera: I hate you sometimes. NOW IS ONE OF THEM! 4:27 pm_

_Zeus: Love you too, sweetie. 4:28 pm_

_Aphrodite: Oh, how I love a good love/hate relationship! 4:29 pm_

**How not to be caught cheating on your wife (this only works of your wife is HERA!)**

**-Just tell…NO ONE **

**-When she asks why you were 'out late again' say that you were helping something, like a small cuckoo bird**

**-Tell her you love her every day**

_Comments on How not to be caught cheating on your wif…: (7)_

_Hera: ! LIES! YOU LIAR! 4:31 pm_

_Zeus: Eh. 4:32 pm_

_Hera: How would you feel if I had multiple children that weren't yours? 4:33 pm_

_Zeus: First of all, crazy lady, I could care less. Second; you can't! you're the GODDESS OF MARRIAGE! 4:34 pm_

_Athena: and it's never wise to betray people. In any way. 4:35 pm_

_Poseidon: You always have to have the last say in everything, don't you? 4:36 pm_

_Athena: Yes, yes I do. :P 4:37 pm_

**How to be a great ruler**

**-BE ME!**

**-Be fair**

**-Be trustworthy**

**-Show no weakness**

**-Show no insecurity**

**-Pretend not to be terrified when Hera (or your daughter, Athena for that matter) goes on a mad rampage**

_Comments on How to be a great ruler: (5)_

_Athena: Oh, now that was crossing the line! 4:38 pm_

**Athena has logged off. Thank you! ~Server 4:39 pm**

_Hera: It indeed was. 4:40 pm_

**Hera has logged off as well. Thank you! ~Server 4:41 pm**

_Poseidon: Women and their mood swings. 4:42_

**Zeus has logged off. He has left this message:**

**I now go hide from wifey and daughter. Uh oh…THEY APPROACHIN MAH COMPUTA! NOOOOOOOOOOOO! HAAAALLLLLLLLLLPPPPPP!**

_**Zeus has been disconnected.**_

A/N there! Thanks to….:

Bonifaco16

GhostDog401

Girlwhoplayswithfire

Livestooshort

AnnabethChaseIsMe1012

Eleos

I'mDifferent-GetOverIt

And all who gave suggestions!

**To all Punishment Readers: Thanks for the great reviews so far! Chapter Four will be up soon! It's called **_**Aphrodite's the Matchmaker.  
><strong>_**I hope y'all enjoyed this chapter! Thanks for the GREAT inspiration, and I'd love ideas for….**

**PERSEPHONE!**

**Persephone's Page is next, and I already have some ideas, but I'd love to hear yours, too!**

**I love feedback almost as much as Aphrodite loves love!**

**~Suzie ;)**


	11. Persephone's Page

I'M BAAAAAACK! (:

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Persephone's Page_

**How to Avoid Being Dragged to the Underworld**

**-Don't be spotted by Hades**

**-Don't LET Hades drag you to Hell**

**-Don't take pomegranates from strangers (or Hades!)**

**-Actually LISTEN to your mother…**

**-Don't eat pomegranates **

_Comments on How to Avoid Being Dragged to the Underw…: (7)_

_Hades: Stop that, Seph. You know you love me. 7:54 am_

_Persephone: How many times have I told you NOT TO CALL ME SEPH! 7:55 am_

_Demeter: I cannot believe that you…Oh, dear, why did you eat the pomegranate? 7:56 am_

_Persephone: Mother, you blaming me never makes the situation better. 7:58 am_

_Athena: I do believe it was unwise to eat anything from anyone. They could poison it…or even put a swarm of guppies in your apple. 7:59 am_

_Poseidon: Ha, that was funny. 8:00 am_

_Athena: Not really! 8:01 am_

**Best Ways to Get Back at Your CHEATING Husband**

**Wear the sexy clothes Aphrodite gave you for your birthday, but ignore his flirting**

**Tell him that Maria di Angelo is going to go to the Fields of Punishment**

**Turn his son into a dandelion**

**Tell him your mother is moving in with you**

**Call him "Uncle Snuggles" instead of "Hubby" or "Husband"**

**When he says he's going out, you say, "Okay. I guess I'll go get the new 'puppy' cage ready."**

**Tell him that Demeter is bringing cereal to eat every day**

**Tell him you fell in love with Charon**

**Slip Truth Serum into his drinks/food and ask him how he feels about his mother-in-law while broadcasting live on Hephaestus TV to Olympus**

**Tie him up in place of Cerberus and tell him he has to bark to be let free again**

**Dress him up as Ken, that gay Barbie doll, when he's asleep**

**Tell him you love either A.) Poseidon or B.) Zeus**

**Make him believe that you just faked eating the pomegranate and you are leaving him**

**Tell him you **_**did **_**see his 'I HEART Hippocampi!' boxers**

**Ask Zeus to zap him with the master bolt. He won't remember a thing.**

_Comments on Best Ways to Get Back at Your C…: (15)_

_Hades: OFFENSIVE! And she's done all of that…just this week. 8:10 pm_

_Athena: That is actually funny, Persephone. 8:11 am_

_Poseidon: WOAH! Wait! Did I just read right? Athena laughing? ATHENA having a sense of HUMOR? 8:12 am_

_Zeus: I'd gladly zap any god or goddess. Except Athena. She's my favorite. 8:14 am_

_Poseidon: How can you like that OWL FACE? 8:15 am_

_Demeter: IT WOULDN'T BE BAD TO BE MORE LIKE HER! She actually eats my cereal every week! 8:16 am_

_Persephone: I do too. Just so she quits whining. 8:17 am_

_Demeter: SEE! Eating my cereal makes me happy. Happy Demeter=no whining! 8:18 am_

_All Gods/Goddesses: (picks up cereal and eats it) 8:19 am-8:30 am_

_Demeter: See! Not hard! 8:31 am_

_Aphrodite: It was okay…but make the box it comes in PINK AND SPARKLY! 8:32 am_

_Hestia: See…if you do what people ask you, it prevents fighting. The opposite of fighting is agreeing, and agreement is peace. 8:34 am_

_Athena: Words of wisdom, young one. I am proud of you! (: 8:35 am_

_Hestia: Thank you, Lady Athena! 8:36 am_

_Poseidon: Oh, sure, just let Athena be the oh-so-perfect goddess. 8:37 am_

**How to Make Demeter Mad**

**-Tell her you HATE cereal**

**-Tell her you LOVE Hades**

**-Tell her cereal is stupid**

**-Make fun of her crops and plants**

**-Tell her the 'squash is squishy' (inside joke between her and I.)**

_Comments on How to Make Demeter Mad: (4)_

_Demeter: I'm so glad you stopped doing these childish things. 8:41 am_

_Persephone: Okay, Mother, I won't ever do these again. I'm sorry. NOW GET ME OUT OF HELL! PLEASE! HE'S…A WEIRDO! AND IT'S HOT HERE! 8:42 am_

_Hades: Geez, you could've just asked me to turn down the heat or on the AC Seph. Gods. *turns on AC* 8:43 am_

_Persephone: I still want OUT OF HERE! 8:44 am_

**Why I HATE pomegranates with a fiery, burning passion**

**-They are squishy**

**-They are too sour for me**

**-They got me stuck with…him**

**-Mother will blow up at me if I say anything GOOD about them**

**-Seriously? Just read the myth. It'll tell YOU ALL ABOUT IT!**

_Comments on Why I HATE pomegranates with a fier….: (8)_

_Hades: I thought it was a rather clever plan. 8:50 am_

_Persephone: Whatever you say. 8:51 am_

_Demeter: I hate you Hades. 8:53 am_

_Hades: We all know that. 8:54 am_

_Athena: Again—not wise to take food from people. I've had TOO many bad experiences with apples. First with Aphrodite getting that apple, then Poseidon putting GUPPIES in my apple…8:56 am_

_Poseidon: Yep. I love to make her life miserable. 8:57 am_

_Aphrodite: That sounds like FLIRTING to me! XD AWWW! NEW OLYMPUS COUPLE! 8:58 am_

_Athena: Great, look what you've gotten me—a SWORN MAIDEN goddess—into. 8:59 am_

**HOW TO TREAT YOUR STEP-SON LIKE ******

**-Turn him into a dandelion**

**-Get Aphrodite to dress him in a Marilyn Monroe outfit (that cute white dress with the low cut and the flowiness…you know THE Marilyn Monroe dress. Just Google "Marilyn Monroe Dress") complete with makeup and the blonde curly wig**

**-Tell him you will talk Hades into sending him to The Fields of Punishment**

_Comments on HOW TO TREAT YOUR STEP-SON LI…: (3)_

_Hades: I WILL MOST DEIFINATLEY NOT! I do care. Just not as much as a normal father would. 9:02 am_

_Athena: I used to love tormenting Percy. Now that he and Annabeth are dating, she threatens me. 9:04 am_

_Poseidon: HA! 9:05 am_

**Why You Should NEVER Eat Underworld Food**

**-They get you stuck here**

**-Look at me. I'm a prime example**

**-Your mother won't let you forget about it!**

**-That would be really awkward if you ate a pomegranate and was a guy…**

_Comments on Why You Should NEVER Eat Under….: (5)_

_Zeus: That would be weird…especially for Poseidon and I. *Shivers* 9:06 am_

_Poseidon: Yes, I agree, that would be ghastly. 9:07 am_

_Athena: Lookie there! Poseidon just used a big word! Should we give him a treat? 9:08 am_

_Poseidon: Haha, very funny, Athena. 9:09 am_

_Athena: Yes, I know it was, wasn't it? 9:10 am_

**How to Look On the Bright Side While in the Underworld**

**-JUST LOOK FORWARD TO, PRAY FOR, AND LOVE THE SIX MONTHS YOU GET OFF!**

_Comments on that extremely long title: (4)_

_Persephone: I'm STILL ON BREAK! YAAAAAY! 9:13 am_

_Hades: Curses. 9:14 am_

_Persephone: Why does it matter to you, Hades? Just go knock up some mortal and you'll feel fine, wont'cha? 9:15 am_

_Demeter: Calm down, Honey. I hate him too. I hate him too…9:16 am_

**How to Stay Sane In the Underworld**

**-Garden every day**

**-Plan revenge on Hades**

**-Admire your gems and jewels**

**-Think about the luxurious six months you'll have off…**

_Comments on How to Stay Sane In the Under…: (5)_

_Athena: I should've done one on: How to Stay Sane with Poseidon Around. 9:17 am_

_Poseidon: Wha-wha. TOO BAD! You didn't. :P 9:18 am_

_Athena: Swim off, Fish Head. 9:20 am_

_Hades: Why do you HATE ME SO MUCH? 9:21 am_

_Persephone: Oh, I don't know. You just…FORCED ME TO AN ETERNITY IN HELL! 9:22 pm_

**How to Survive With a Horrid Husband**

**-THE SIX MONTHS! Just think…**

**-Just…relax. And DO NOT do his bidding. Be lazy for once**

_Comments on How to Survive With a Horrid…: (5)_

_Hades: Again, hurtful! 9:23 am_

_Persephone: Again, IDC! 9:24 am_

_Hades: What? 9:25 am_

_Persephone: I= I D= Don't C=Care 9:26 am_

_Hades: And I HATE lazy people! 9:27 am_

**Did you guys see the Percy Jackson movie? They portrayed Persephone (ME!) as a sex-crazed SLUT who only wanted people to 'get with' her! I MEAN SERIOUSLY! I am NOT like that! ! WHY DO PEOPLE PORTRAY ME WRONG? HUH? ?**

_No Comments on Persephone's Ranting…in fear of her snipping at them._

**Ways to pass time in the Underworld**

**-Garden**

**-Annoy Hades**

**-Feed Cerberus**

**-Annoy Hades some more**

**-Actually play with Cerberus (thanks to Annabeth Chase for inspiring that great idea! He's less snippy and annoying now! You know, THE Annabeth Chase. Like, when she came here when she was twelve with Percy...that Annabeth.)**

_Comments on Ways to pass time in the Underwor…: (1)_

_Hades: Actually…interact with that dog? Who would've thought._

**Persephone has logged off of Godbook, leaving this message:**

**I hate it in the Underworld. **

**~~X.O.X.O. to everybody but Hades, **

**Persephone (:**

A/N Thanks to:

Laylaenchantix101

Shrug (anon)

Bookwormgirl2497

Forever a mystry

Artemis (not the goddess, lol, the anon)

GhostDog401

Redwaves9

Eleos

C-Nuggets N.L.

Girlwhoplayswithfire

And DIFFERENT! (Again….!)

THANKS TO ALL MY IDEA PPL AND REVIEWERS!

_**Next Time on Godbook…**_

_**HESTIA'S PAGE!**_

_**I NEED IDEAS PLEASE! THANK YOU!**_

I love feedback almost as much as…you know the rest.

~~X.O.X.O. To everyone but Hades,

Suzie (:

(I totally did _not _just copy Persephone's sig…haha…ha…ha?)

TEN PAGES! AHHH! I need a nap…

"_With great writing amounts comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later."_

_~Suzie, five seconds ago, ripping off Nico's saying._


	12. Hestia's Page

A/N: Sorry for the wait! Here's Chapter Twelve; Hestia's Page!

I do not own PJO, or the quote "'You're drunk,' 'You're sexy'" from Family Guy. I don't watch that show, but I saw that quote on the internet and had to use it (:

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Hestia's Page_

**How to keep peace in families:**

**-Give up your throne for the god of wine…or any god Zeus wants to replace you with, really**

**-Do NOT take sides in family arguments; I've been told pain, golden blood, ambrosia, and nectar are always involved (that's just if you're lucky)**

**-Be nice**

**-Tend the hearth; complain to IT not your family; it's a much better listener**

_Comments on How to keep peace in families: (13)_

_Dionysus: What? Nooo. You didn't give up da throneeeee. I t-took it frum youuuuu! 7:03 am_

_Athena: You're drunk. 7:04 am_

_Dionysus: You're sexyyyy. 7:05 am_

_Poseidon: Hey! Nobody calls Athena Sexy! 7:06 am_

_Aphrodite: Why would you care? Unless you likeeeeeeee her! 7:07 am_

_Zeus: Okay, I'll just pretend I never heard any of that conversation. And Dionysus! You swore you would stop drinking! 7:08 am_

_**Dionysus has been forcibly removed from the computer by Zeus. Don't expect him to be back soon. Thank You! ~Server 7:09 am**_

_Athena:….Sexy? Really? I take that as an insult. 7:10 am_

_Aphrodite: Why? I get told that alllll the time (: Not that you're sexy…that I am. Cause that would be weird…7:11 am_

_Demeter: My cereal is sexy. 7:12 am_

_Everyone: WHA? 7:13 am_

_Demeter: HADES! I AM GOING TO KILL THAT BOY! HADES WROTE THAT! NOT ME! 7:14 am_

_Hades: hehe. 7:15 am_

**How not to feel left out**

**-Have a positive attitude**

**-When you are asked to do something, you do it**

**-Give up things before they are rudely taken away from you**

_Comments on How not to feel left out: (11)_

_Athena: Yeah, people just don't get the virgin goddesses. 7:16 am_

_Poseidon: You are boring, Hestia. Live a little! 7:17 am_

_Athena: Poseidon! What a rude thing to say. 7:18 am_

_Poseidon: :P 7:19 am_

_Athena: :P 7:20 am_

_Aphrodite: THAT STANDS FOR FRENCH KISSING! YOU GUYS ARE SERIOUS XD! XD! XD! 7:21 am_

_Persephone: No, Aphrodite, the :P thing stands for sticking your tongue out at people. Sort of like the thing I do every day to Hades. 7:22 am_

_Hades: It's true. She does. But secretly we all know that she LOVES me. What's not to love? 7:23 am_

_Demeter: Everything. 7:24 am_

_Hades: Hurtful…7:25 am_

_Athena: O.o I have the weirdest family. 7:26 am_

**How to make sure your family doesn't kill each other**

**(Really, they can't die. But it's the thought that counts.)**

**-Step in during fights to calm it down**

**-Don't let Aphrodite and Athena get in a fight. It ends with pink eye shadow, red lipstick, owl feathers, and pieces of a text book thrown at you (yeah, that one hurt. Physically and emotionally.)**

**-Don't let Hephaestus and Ares get in a fight. You do NOT want to know what scars you'll have after that one.**

**-Try to gather as many gods as possible around the warm hearth. It calms the nerves.**

**-Try to figure out what suits both points of view.**

_Comments on How to make sure your family doesn't k…: (29)_

_Poseidon: Goody-two-shoes Athena got in a fight? With APHRODITE? 7:31 am_

_Athena: Shut it, Fish Head. 7:32 am_

_Poseidon: Geez. Sorry Miss I Know Best. 7:33 am_

_Athena: Because I DO know best, I don't take offense to that. 7:34 am_

_Poseidon: Really? What DON'T you know? 7:35 am_

_Athena: Nothing. I know everything. 7:36 am_

_Poseidon: How many kids do I have? 7:37 am_

_Athena: Too much to even be considered a 'player' 7:38 am_

_Ares: OOOOH! ANOTHER BURN FOR FISH BOY! ATHENA: INFINITY POSEIDON: ZERO! 7:39 am_

_Poseidon: Whatever. 7:40 am_

_Athena: :P 7:41 am_

_Aphrodite: OMGODS! You two fight like an old married couple. 7:42 am_

_Poseidon: Shut it, Perfume-For-Brains. 7:43 am_

_Athena: HEY! That's what I call her! 7:44 am_

_Poseidon: Whatever. 7:45 am_

_Zeus: My brother and my daughter…gross. 7:46 am_

_Athena: DADDY! I am not in a relationship with….THAT THING! 7:48 am_

_Poseidon: Oh, so first I have a fish for a head and now I'm a 'thing'? 7:49 am_

_Aphrodite: *coughs* OLD MARRIED COUPLE *coughs* 7:50 am_

_Hestia: Hey now! Let's not fight. Calm down, guys, and think of ways to be kind towards one another. 7:51 am_

_~~20 minutes later~~_

_Athena: I got nothing. 8:11 am_

_Poseidon: HA! Goddess of WISDOM doesn't have a PLAN! 8:12 am_

_Athena: Yes I do. It involves hitting you over the head with a pan, thus knocking you out. 8:12 am_

_Hestia: Calm down, Lady Athena! And…really? 8:13 am_

_Athena:…Yes. 7:56 am_

_Hestia: Why? 8:14 am_

_Athena: Just because…payback is terrible. 8:15 am_

_Poseidon: I'm scared. 8:16 am_

_Athena: As you should be. 8:17 am_

**How to shut up Aphrodite when she is on a [love] rampage**

**-Tell her that she must go break up an arguing couple**

**-Show her pictures of couples (it calms her down)**

**-Say that the newest Abercrombie & Fitch shirts are for sale **

**-Tell her that someone stole her perfume (it takes her a while to count all 5,234,367,792 perfumes)**

**-Turn on a soap opera. It shuts her up immediately. **

_Comments on How to shut up Aphrodite when she is on…: (14)_

_Aphrodite: Yes, yes, it is true. I have a VERY SMALL collection of perfumes. It is such a shame… 8:19 am_

_Athena: Small? SMALL? I have ONE perfume that I haven't even touched. 8:20 am_

_Aphrodite: OOOH! Which one? 8:21 am_

_Athena: Poseidon gave it to me as a joke. A very un comedic joke. 8:22 am_

_Aphrodite: And it's called…8:23 am_

_Athena: *sigh* Sexy Hips. 8:24 am_

_Poseidon: I remember that (: 8:25 am_

_Hermes: What? Poseidon gave ATHENA a perfume called…Sexy Hips? 8:26 am_

_Athena: Yes. Remember Hermes? You delivered it to me. 8:27 am_

_Aphrodite:…one sec…let me go look under the "S" section in my perfume. 8:28 am_

_~Ten Minutes Later~_

_Aphrodite: I found it! I have twelve of them. Sorry, Athena. You can keep it. 8:38 am_

_Zeus: Daughter, you kept a gift from Poseidon…your enemy? 8:39 am_

_Athena: So what? Every time I tried to get rid of it, it came back. It's enchanted. 8:40 am_

_Poseidon: Hehe. 8:41 am_

**How to stop your family from killing each other (again…more ways. It's the thought that counts.)**

**-Be sure to STOP ALL FIGHTING!**

**-Agree that there shouldn't be a war**

**-Take away all weapons**

**-Try to calm down any god or goddess (mostly Zeus) when they are upset**

_Comments on that REALLLLLY LONG TITLE: (13)_

_Zeus: I NEVER get upset!.8:43 am_

_Athena: Nor do I! 8:44 am_

_Poseidon: I think stubbornness runs in the family. 8:45 am_

_Athena: I AM NOT STUBBORN! 8:46 am_

_Hades: Yes you are. And so is Demeter….8:47 am_

_Demeter: Are you insulting me again, Hades? 8:48 am_

_Hades: O.o NO! I am not! I was just saying…CRAP! Isn't there a "delete comment" button anywhere? 8:49 am_

_Demeter: Nope. 8:50 am_

_Hades: Shoot. MOTHER IN LAW rearranged is WOMAN HITLER! 8:51 am_

_Athena: That wasn't a very wise movie, Uncle. 8:52 am_

_Demeter: No it was not. 8:53 am_

_**Hades is offline. 8:54 am**_

_Demeter: Good. 8:55 am_

**How to keep good self-esteem**

**-Keep a good appearance (it just helps you not frown upon yourself ;))**

**-Say to yourself everything you love about you (but don't be vain)**

**-Make friends (:**

**-Meditate (it calms you down)**

**-Set goals. When you reach them you will feel better about yourself**

**-Feel HAPPY!**

_Comments on the very touching words: (8)_

_Ares: *Sniffles* That was b-beautiful! I have found new respect for the puny Last Olympian. 8:56 am_

_Hestia: Thanks, Lord Ares! 8:57 am_

_Ares: Don't get used to it kid. 8:58 am_

_Hestia: Yes, Lord Ares. 8:59 am_

_Athena: You know that you don't have to call everyone 'Lady' and 'Lord', right? By now, we all have nick names for each other. Please, call me Athena. 9:01 am_

_Hestia: Okay, L—Athena.9:02 am_

_Poseidon: Just call her Owl Head. That's what I do. 9:03 am_

_Athena: Don't listen to that jerk. 9:04 am_

**Can ANYBODY tell me why Athena and Poseidon can't make peace? All those failed attempts…**

_Comments on the very true question: (9)_

_Athena: HA! She put my name first! 9:05 am_

_Poseidon: I don't want to 'make' ANYTHING with Athena. 9:06 am_

_Zeus: O.o 9:07 am_

_**Hades is back online 9:08 am**_

_Hades: O.o Brother, why do you always think like that? Especially when it's concerning Athena… 9:09_

_Everybody but Poseidon: ! 9:10 am_

_Athena: *blushes* yeah, why? 9:11 am_

_Aphrodite: OOOH Poseidon LIKES ATHENA! 9:12 am_

_Poseidon: No I don't. I hate her. 9:13 am_

**How to have peace remain**

**-Don't let Ares start a war. Keep him with Aphrodite**

**-Keep Athena and Poseidon away from each other**

**-Keep Demeter away from Hades**

**-Don't say anything about Thalia and Nico together; you upset two gods and one goddess with infinite arrows**

**-Don't tell Athena you think Percy and Annabeth are 'cute' together**

**-Have Apollo quit saying he's older…though he probably won't**

**-Do NOT insult another god/goddess**

_Comments on How to have peace remain: (7)_

_Apollo: No I will not. 9:15 am_

_Artemis: APOLLO! You are NOT older! WE ARE TWINS! I helped mother GIVE BIRTH to you!9:16 am_

_Apollo: Whatever, Arty. 9:17 am_

_Artemis: My name is ArtEMIS! 9:18 am_

_Athena: FOR THE LAST TIME! Everybody! I DO NOT HAVE ANYTHING AGAINST PERCY! I really wish Annabeth would choose someone else, but that is HER decision. 9:19 am_

_Ares: I have nothing against that plan ;) 9:20 am_

_Hestia: Still in twelve-year-old form. 9:21 am_

**Hestia has logged off, leaving this message:**

**Peace to all!**

**~Hestia, the goddess who really needs a nap by the hearth. THIS time without having water poured all over her, grapes thrown at her, or zapped by a lightning bolt to wake her up. I mean, really, just tapping my shoulder will get me up, people.**

A/N:

Well, there you go. THANKS TO EVERYBODY WHO REVIEWED!

I ESPECIALLY THANK EVERYBODY WHO RECOMMENDED IDEAS THAT I USED!

Sorry, you know who you are. I'm really tired and worn out right now, so I'm not in a mood to write a thousand names down…haha.

OH! Up next is Hera. Ideas please?

RANDOM QUESTION!

Okay, my friend thinks Thalia is pronounced TAL YA

My other friend thinks it is pronounced THAL YA

One even thought it was THA LEE AH

Which do you say? I always thought it was THAL YA, but I am utterly confuzzled right now. And tired.

PLEASE GIVE SUGGESTIONS FOR HERA AND HOW YOU THINK THALIA'S NAME IS PRONOUCED!

~Su…Su…zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzie

(get it? Like ZZZZ in sleeping…suZie…no? Okay.)

_Suzie: Night night!1:57 pm_

_Ally: Suzie…it's only about two in the afternoon.1:58 pm_

_Suzie: Whatever. 1:59 pm_

_Ally: Don't whatever me! 2:00 pm_


	13. Hera's Page

A/N: HELLO! XD Here's chapter…one…two…three...chapter _something _ of Godbook (:

I do not own PJO, or Facebook, which this is merely a rip-off of (: I also do not own the song 'Womanizer' by Britney Spears XD

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Hera's Page_

**How to Make a Perfect Family**

**-Don't be my family**

**-Chuck the ugly ones off of a cliff (or Olympus. Olympus works too.)**

**-Don't sit in home-made chairs**

**-Yell at your no good, dirty rotten, cheating husband**

**-Banish the children from your home when they become a disgrace (until your husband tells them to come back)**

**-Don't cheat, no matter how much you'd like to give your husband a taste of his own medicine**

_Comments on How to Make a Perfect Family: (14)_

_Zeus: Hurtful. 5:24 pm_

_Hera: It was meant to be. 5:25 pm_

_Athena: Am I the only one tired of their fighting? Think RATIONALLY! Fighting is not the answer. 5:26 pm_

_Ares: Athena is right. BAZOOKAS ARE! HAHA! THIS MEANS WAR! 5:27 pm_

_Athena: War. Is not. The answer. 5:28 pm_

_Poseidon: If you're the goddess of battle strategy, why don't you encourage war? 5:29 pm_

_Athena: Long explanation, or short? 5:30 pm_

_Everybody: SHORT! 5:31 pm_

_Athena: I don't support war. I'm just there whenever people need planning. 5:32 pm_

_Aphrodite: War makes people get all sweaty and gross. AND it ruins clothes! 5:35 pm_

_Hera: No. I won't go to war with my husband. I'll be a better wife than that. 5:36 pm_

_Zeus:…Um, thank you, dear? 5:37 pm_

_Hera: We'll see. 5:38 pm_

_Zeus: Am I the only one who gets frightened by her? 5:39 pm_

**How to Know Your Husband Is Cheating**

**-You see him come back home in the middle of the night**

**-He's layered in cheap perfume**

**-He ends up with two kids from the same woman! I'm glad he named them respectively after our Mythology, but still! Thalia AND Jason?**

_Comments on How to Know Your Husband Is Cheating: (10)_

_Aphrodite: Aw, but Hera! Jason and Piper would make an AH-DORABLE couple! 5:43 pm_

_Hera: I'm not saying they wouldn't. I'm just saying that one spawn is enough. I don't need two. 5:45 pm_

_Zeus: I said I was SORRY! 5:46 pm_

_Hera: And what's even WORSE is that Jason is ROMAN while his sister is GREEK. 5:47 pm_

_Zeus:…Sorry? 5:48 pm_

_Athena: I give up on these two. 5:49 pm_

_Aphrodite: Don't worry, Athena! I'll batch up a love potion for the two! We'll have more gods in no time! 5:50 pm_

_Athena: Didn't need to hear that. 5:51 pm_

_Aphrodite: Oh. Sorry. He's your..dad…yeah. 5:52 pm_

_Poseidon: Baby gods are annoying. 5:53 pm_

**How to DEAL with a cheating husband**

**-Ignore his apologies**

**-Yell at him**

**-Throw sharp things. He can't die; why not amuse yourself?**

**-Make him apologize, but REJECT it**

**-Make him listen to the song 'Womanizer' by Britney Spears over and over until he hums it **

_Comments on How to DEAL with a cheating husband: (20)_

_Zeus: 'Superstar, where you from how's it goin? I know you got a clue what you're doing'! 5:57 pm_

_Aphrodite: 'You can play brand new to all the other chicks out here but I know what you are—what you are baby!' 5:58 pm_

_Artemis: What the heck. I'll join singing too! At least it's about a girl hating a boy!  
>'Look at you! Getting more than just a re-up! Baby you, got all the puppets with their strings up! Faking like a good one, but I call 'em like I see 'em I know what you are! What you are baby! 6:00 pm<span>_

_Apollo: God of MUSIC here! I'll join as well!  
>'Womanizer, woman-womanizer, you're a womanizer! Oh, womanizer, Oh, you're a womanizer baby! You, you, you are! You, you, you are! Womanizer, womanizer, womanizer! 6:03 pm<span>_

_Artemis: 'Boy don't try to front, I know just—just what you are, are, are! Boy don't try to front I know just—just what you are, are, are!' 6:04 pm_

_Aphrodite: 'You, you got me going! You, you're oh, so charming! You, but I can't do it! You Womanizer!' 6:05 pm_

_Athena: That's enough. I'm scarred for life now. 6:06 pm_

_Poseidon: What? Goddess of Wisdom can't handle knowing that her daddy is a player? 6:07 pm_

_Athena: At least he is. You, Poseidon, are just a wanna-be player. 6:08 pm_

_Ares: AND SHE BURNS HIM AGAIN! WHOO! SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT—HE'S BURNIN'! 6:09 pm_

_Poseidon: You take amusement to people being insulted, don't you? 6:10 pm_

_Ares: Nope. Just when you're insulted by your crush. 6:11 pm_

_Athena: I'm not his crush! 6:12 pm_

_Poseidon: I don't like her! 6:13 pm_

_Ares: Sure, sure. Then why do you try so hard to hide it? 6:14 pm_

_Hera: Sorry to interrupt, but did you really just spend about ten minutes singing Womanizer? 6:15 pm_

_Zeus: :P yep! 6:16 pm_

_Hera: D—__**We have blocked this offensive word used by the Queen of the gods quite often. Thank You! ~Server**__! That means I have to find a NEW guilt song! Just..uh…ignore the next segment, then. 6:17 pm_

_Zeus: What segment? 6:18 pm_

_Athena: The one below all these comments! Geez. 6:19 pm_

**LISTEN TO THIS SONG, ZEUS!**

**Go to OlympusTube**

**Search under 'Hera's Picks'**

**Find number four**

**Click on it**

**The song should be **_**Womanizer: A Tribute to My 'Loving' Husband**_

_Comments on LISTEN TO THIS SONG, ZEUS!: (2)_

_Zeus: I already have. And it's quite catchy. 6:22 pm_

_Hera: Grr.6:23 pm_

**How to Get Revenge on Annabeth: The Smarty-Pants daughter of the Wisdom Freak:**

**-Threaten her**

**-Tell her she's dumb**

**-Send intestinally challenged cows after her**

**-Replace her boyfriend, the leader of the Greek camp, with Jason, the spawn of Zeus and the leader of the Roman camp.**

_Only one comment is below: Brace yourselves, it's __**Athena's comment**__. Earplugs are advised if you are in the same building as her._

_Athena: the Ticked Off goddess: I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU HAVE THE NERVE TO WRITE THIS ABOUT MY DAUGHTER! ANNABETH IS NOT DUMB; SHE IS MY CHILD! WHY WOULD YOU SEND INTESTINALLY CHALLENGED COWS AFTER HER? THAT IS JUST __**SICK**__! AND THAT IS TAKING IT ONE STEP TOO FAR OVER THE LINE, HERA! I MAY NOT APPROVE OF ANNABETH DATING A POSEIDON CHILD, BUT IT MAKES HER HAPPY! YOU CAUSED HER SO MUCH DISTRESS AND—AND—YOU KNOW WHAT, HERA? I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU RIGHT NOW! YOU'RE THE GODDESS OF MARRIAGE! GET PERSEUS BACK AT CAMP HALF-BLOOD AND START ARRANGING THEIR FREAKING WEDDING! 6:35 pm_

**Okay. Over Athena's ranting.**

**Why cows and peacocks are awesome**

**-Peacocks have thousands of eyes (on their feathers) to spy on Zeus**

**-Peacocks are beautiful, just like me**

**-Cows are nurturing**

_Comments on Why cows and peacocks are awesome: (13)_

_Zeus: I have another one! Cows are fat; just like Hera. 6:37 pm_

_**You can probably guess what just happened. Yeah…don't expect Zeus to be back soon. ~Server 6:38 pm**_

_Athena: Obviously the owl is the best animal. They represent wisdom and knowledge, and they are MY animal. 6:40 pm_

_Aphrodite: NO obviously the DOVE is the best animal. It represents love, and it is sometimes used at weddings as a symbol of their eternal love for another. They don't let _owls _go to represent love. 6:42 pm_

_Athena: OWL! 6:43 pm_

_Aphrodite: DOVE! 6:44 pm_

_(Here is the looooong part: OWL! DOVE! OWL! DOVE! OWL! DOVE!)_

_Poseidon: STOP! Obviously, the horse is the best animal. I mean, I made it. (: 6:51 pm_

**Best locations for a wedding**

**Olympus, of course**

**A beach**

**A church**

**A quiet, serene, remote location**

**A private island**

_Comments on…that girly post: (4)_

_Hades: The Underworld is nice this year. Very warm here. Perfect for marriage! 6:56 pm_

_Persephone: Go AWAY Hades! 6:57 pm_

_Hades: :P party pooper. 6:58 pm_

_Demeter: DON'T CALL MY DAUGHTER NAMES! 6:59 pm_

**Hera has signed off, leaving this message:**

**Zeus, I'm watching you.**

**~-~Hera, the goddess who will officially lose it if she gets another half-child.**

A/N: SOOOO: Up next: DIONYSUS!

Ideas?

Thanks to all the reviews! I wrote this at 11:00 pm last night, so I'm tired, but you know which idea I used that's yours.

Sorry for being so tired all the time…I'm a busy girl (:

I love feedback almost as much as Aphrodite loves love.

~Suzie


	14. Dionysus's Page

A/N: HEYYY! I IS BACCCCK!

Sorry about the author's note (: I just thought Ally deserved it! LOVE YA ALLY!

I don't own PJO!

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Dionysus's Page_

**How to Make Campers Miserable **

**-Call them their wrong names**

**-Punish them for things they didn't do**

**-Run around camp in a bikini (LOOONG story. But all the campers were afraid to talk to me for a while, so I got some peace and quiet)**

**-Yell at them for taking strawberries from the field**

**-Tell them that they are not a demigod; it was all a joke and that their real other parent is dead**

_Comments on How to Make Campers Miserable: (14)_

_Aphrodite: Di! How TERRIBLE! 7:56 am_

_Athena: very terrible indeed. 7:57 am_

_Dionysus: :D 7:58 am_

_Zeus: Just for that…ANOTHER FIFTY YEARS! 7:59 am_

_Dionysus: :( 7:59 am_

_Poseidon: Cruel. But funny. 8:00 am_

_Hermes: Heh. That would be funny, pulling prank like that! 8:01 am_

_Athena: You guys are terrible! 8:02 am_

_Poseidon: I know you want me ;) 8:03 am_

_Athena: Yeah. I want you dead. 8:04 am_

_Ares: DUDE! YOU JUS T GOT…8:05 am_

_Poseidon: I KNOW! I just got 'burned. Again.' 8:06 am_

_Ares: Dude, you're making the fire department go CRAZY! 8:07 am_

_Aphrodite: That's enough, dear. 8:08 am_

**How to SCARE demi-twerps**

**-Threaten to turn them into grapes**

**-Threaten them that when they are a grape YOU WILL SQUISH THEIR TINY BRAINS OUT! HAHA!**

**-When they snicker at you behind your back, make vines wrap around them and say "Oops."**

**-Look them in the eye and say "You must REALLLLLY want to be vaporized, don't you?**

**-Just be a god**

_Comments on How to SCARE demi-twerps: (14)_

_Zeus: You won't learn when to shut your mouth, will you? 8:11 am_

_Dionysus: NOPE XD LAWLZ WAZ I DAHH ONLY ONE WHO PARTAYYYED LAST NIGHT? 8:12 am_

_Athena: Yes. You were. 8:13 am_

_Poseidon: But we're gonna party at the Winter Formal tonight! WOOT-WOOT! 8:14 am (Punishment Reference XD)_

_Artemis: Correction. YOU are. I'm going to sit in a corner and laugh at all the foolish males who get drunk on coca cola and Pepsi. 8:15 am_

_Athena: I'll join you. 8:16 am_

_Aphrodite: AWW! You guys are no fun! ENJOY THE DANCE! 8:17 am_

_Hades: Persephone's going with me! Haha! How AWESOME is that? 8:18 am_

_Athena: Almost as awesome as the time we found you snuggling a teddy bear and wearing rubber duck pajamas. 8:19 am_

_Hades: HEY! I told you never to speak of that again…Mr. Cuddly Foo Foo doesn't like to be gossiped about. 8:20 am_

_Ares: EVERYBODY! BOW BEFORE THE BEAR HUGGING, DUCK WEARING RULER OF THE UNDERWORLD! 8:21 am_

_Every god: *Bow. Bow. Bow. Bow.* 8:22 am_

_Hades: I don't know whether to be humiliated or pleased. 8:23 am_

_Demeter: HUMILIATED! 8:24 am_

**How to ANNOY the demi-twerps**

**-Call them different names (again) EXAMPLE: Peter Johnson instead of whatever his name is**

**-Mock them**

**-Let things (dryads, nymphs, centaurs, vines, Annabeth, anything really) attack them and not help them**

**-SEND THEM ON A SUICIDAL QUEST!**

_Comments on how to ANNOY the demi-twerps: (13)_

_Athena: ! ANNABETH DOES NOT JUST RANDOMLY ATTACK PEOPLE! Well, unless they touched her stuff, joked about Perseus, or embarrassed her. BUT SHE IS NOT LIKE THAT! 8:27 am_

_Aphrodite: WHAT IF THEY LOVED SOMEONE AND DIED ON A QUEST? Wouldn't you feel bad? 8:28 am_

_Dionysus: NAWW. I'D JUST…JUST…JUST LET TEHHHH ODDER PERSON DRINK AWAY…AY…THEIR SORRRROWZ. 8:30 am_

_Athena: Not wise. YOU DO NOT DRINK EVERY NIGHT! How many times have I told you this? You get hung-over every night, and remember none of it the next! 8:32 am_

_Dionysus: DATS DA POINT TOOTZ! 8:33 am _

_Poseidon: HEY! FIRST YOU CALL HER SEXY AND NOW 'TOOTZ'? NOBODY CALLS ATHENA TOOTZ! 8:34 am_

_Dionysus: SOMEONE LIKEYYY ATHEEENIEE! 8:35 am_

_Poseidon: I do not! 8:36 am_

_Aphrodite: Sure, sure. I'll give you two a few more weeks. There'll be a new thought-god in no time! Because Athena can't break her vow…so OMGS! I am a genius! Athena! You can have romances with gods like I do and have THOUGHT GOD CHILDREN with them! EEEP! 8:38 am_

_Athena: No thank you. 8:39 am_

_Apollo: I foresee a cute sea and wisdom baby in the future…8:40 am_

_Athena: Cut that out! You're not funny! 8:41 am_

_Apollo: But I'm hot! You can't deny that! Why? Check my page. You'll see. 8:42 am_

**How to Mess Up Campers' Names**

**-Take their initials: Like um...that Annabelle girl: AC and change it to something like Anniebelle Chats**

**-OR you can just call the campers each other's names. LIKE…Uh…Like That Silly Beauty and Katherine Gapner each other's names.**

_Comments on How to Mess Up Campers' Names: (18)_

_Athena: It's ANNABETH CHASE! 8:45 am_

_Aphrodite: SILENA BEAUREGARD! 8:46 am_

_Demeter: KATIE GARDNER! 8:47 am_

_Poseidon: Wow. Three hot chicks mad…8:48 am_

_Athena: Did you just call me a chick? And hot? 8:49 am_

_Poseidon: IwellIwasjustsayingthatand…oh what's the point. 8:50 am_

_Aphrodite: Thank you, Poseidon. Though I get that a lot (: 8:51 am _

_Demeter: Whatever, Sea Boy. 8:52 am_

_Hera: yep. Time to start planning Athena and Poseidon's wedding. What color do you two like best? 8:53 am_

_Athena: We are not getting married! Oh, and gray. 8:54 am_

_Poseidon: Yeah, but if we were, the color would be __**sea green **__not gray. 8:55 am_

_Athena: Gray. 8:56 am_

_Poseidon: Sea Green. 8:57 am_

_Athena: GRAY! 8:58 am_

_Poseidon: SEA GREEN! 8:59 am_

_Athena: GRAY AND THAT'S FINAL! HERA! GRAY! 9:00 am_

_Hera: Gray…okay…what venue? 9:01 am_

_Athena: Wait! NO! I was just saying…WE'RE NOT GETTING MARRIED! 9:02 am_

**OTHER ways to annoy the brats**

**-Warn them that you can turn them into a dolphin**

**-Be a charming god of wine**

**-Play pinochle all day and ignore their problems**

**-Ignore them when they talk to you**

**-Tell them they are useless**

**-When they leave camp follow them and PUNISH THEM! (I was going to do that with Peter Johnson when he chased his stupid girlfriend but NOOO. I wasn't allowed :P)**

_Comments on OTHER ways to annoy the brats: (10)_

_Athena: Annabeth is not stupid. She's my child, so you'd be calling me stupid. And you don't want that. 9:03 am_

_Poseidon: OOOH. You don't want that. I have experience! 9:04 am_

_Aphrodite: No duh. Boys always insult girls when they like them. It's in Boy 101. 9:05 am_

_Athena: I own every single book ever created. There is no 'Boy 101'. 9:06 am_

_Aphrodite:…I'll go fix that then. I'll…MAKE A BOOK! 9:07 am_

_Everybody: *GASP!* 9:08 am_

_Hades: You…WRITE A BOOK? MY FAMILY CRACKS-ME-UP! 9:09 am_

_Ares: Honey…maybe you should just stick with being pretty. 9:10 am_

_Aphrodite: NO! I WILL WRTE THIS BOOK! 9:11 am_

_**Aphrodite has logged off to…go write a book. Whatever. Good Luck, Aphrodite. Don't give yourself a paper cut. Thank you! ~Server 9:12 am**_

**Why Coke Just Isn't As Good As Wine**

**-Wine comes in all different flavors! Coke is…just coke**

**-Wine can get ya drunk! Then you start having REAL fun!**

**-Sure, coke is served at wild parties, but wine has been around MUCH longer!**

_Comments on Why Coke Just Isn't As Good….: (2)_

_Pan: Yes, even though I'm not really alive, yet not dead, I have an account. And Dionysus; Don't let Grover hear you say that. He loves coke cans. 9:13 am_

_Dionysus: WAAATEVA! 9:14 am_

**DIRTY SECRETS FROM WILD PARTIES! (GOD EDITION)**

**-ARTEMIS KISSED A GIRL! (And she liked it! The taste of her cherry chapstick…haha.)**

**-ATHENA AND POSEIDON KISSED! FOR A WHOLE FOUR SECONDS!**

**-APHRODITE AND ARES…DISAPPEARD…doing Zeus knows what.**

**-HERA MARRIED HERMES! They got a divorce as soon as they found out though. Party Poopers.**

_**Aphrodite has logged back on.**_

_Comments on DIRTY SECRETS FROM WILD PARTIES!...: (9)_

_Athena: ! 9:15 am_

_Poseidon: We…did? 9:16 am_

_Hera: I did no such thing! 9:17 am_

_Aphrodite: SICK MIND! We never do that at parties! 9:18 am_

_Artemis: YOU WILL PAY! I HAVE NEVER KISSED ANOTHER FEMALE! 9:19 am_

_Dionysus: SUREEEE WHATEVA! 9:20 am_

_Athena: I would never kiss Poseidon! You were OBVIOUSLY drunk when you posted this! 9:21 am_

_Hermes: YEAH! Why would I marry a married goddess? Especially if she was married to the god who can kill me just with a look! AND GODS AREN'T SUPPOSED TO DIE! 9:22 am_

_Zeus: Good. Even though I rarely care anymore. Still, it's good to be feared. 9:23 am_

**MAH FAVORITE SONG! **

**RAISE YOUR GLASS  
>by P!nk!<strong>

_Comments on MAH FAVORITE SONG!: () _(I had fun writing this part XD)

_Zeus: 'RIGHT, RIGHT, TURN OFF THE LIGHTS, WE GONNA LOSE OUR MINDS TONIGHT, WHAT'S THE DEALEO? I LOVE WHEN IT'S ALL TOO MUCH 5:00 AM TURN THE RADIO UP, WHERE'S THE ROCK 'N' ROLL?' 9:27 AM_

_Apollo: 'PARTY CRASHER, PANTY SNATCHER! CALL ME UP IF YOU A GANGSTA! DON'T BE FANCY, JUST GET DANCY! WHY SO SERIOUS?' 9:28 am_

_Aphrodite: why not? 'SO RAISE YOUR GLASS IF YOU ARE WRONG, IN ALL THE RIGHT WAYS ALL MY UNDERDOGS! WE WILL NEVER BE, NEVER BE ANYTHING BUT LOUD, AND NITTY-GRITTY DIRTY LITTLE FREAKS!' 9:30 am_

_Dionysus: 'WON'T YOU COME ONE, AND COME ON, AND RAISE YOUR GLASS! JUST COME ON, AND COME ON, AND RAISE YOUR GLASS!' 9:31 am_

_Poseidon: 'SLAM, SLAM, OH HOT **** WHAT PART OF PARTY DON'T YA UNDERSTAND, WISH YOU'D JUST FREAK OUT!' Come on, Athena! 9:32 am_

_Athena: No way. 9:33 am_

_Poseidon: PLEASE? It even fits with the song lyrics "Wish you'd just freak out!" 9:34 am_

_Aphrodite: "JUST FREAK OUT ALREADY!" 9:35 am_

_Poseidon:…and that part too. 9:36 _

_Athena: NO! 9:37 am_

_Apollo: fine then. I'll sing. 'CAN'T STOP, COMING IN HOT, I SHOULD BE LOCKED UP RIGHT ON THE SPOT! IT'S SO ON RIGHT NOW!' 9:38 am_

_Ares: 'PARTY CRASHER, PANTY SNATCHER! CALL ME UP IF YOU A GANGSTA! DON'T BE FANCY, JUST GET DANCY! WHY SO SERIOUS?' 9:40 am_

_Aphrodite: 'SO RAISE YOUR GLASS IF YOU ARE WRONG, IN ALL THE RIGHT WAYS, ALL MY UNDERDOGS, WE WILL NEVER BE, NEVER BE ANYTHING BUT LOUD, AND NITTY GRITTY DIRTY LITTLE FREAKS!' 9:41 am_

_Dionysus: 'WON'T YOU COME ON, AND COME ON AND RAISE YOUR GLASS! JUST COME ON, AND COME ON AND RAISE YOUR GLASS! WON'T YOU COME ON, AND COME ON AND RAISE YOUR GLASS…JUST COME ON AND COME ON AND RAISE YOUR GLASS!' 9:42 am_

_Poseidon: Next part fits Athena so well… 9:43 am_

_Athena: Fine. 'Oh **** my glass is empty…that SUCKS! So if you're too school for cool…and you're treated like a fool…you can chose to let it go…we can always, we can always…party on our own!' HAPPY? 9:45 am_

_Poseidon: eh. It works. 'SO RAISE YOUR GLASS! SO RAISE YOUR GLASS IF YOU ARE WRONG, IN ALL THE RIGHT WAYS, ALL MY UNDERDOGS! WE WILL NEVER BE, NEVER BE ANYTHING BUT LOUD, AND NITTY GRITTY DIRTY LITTLE FREAKS! 9:46 am_

_Dionysus: SO RAISE YOUR GLASS! SO RAISE YOUR GLASS IF YOU ARE WRONG, IN ALL THE RIGHT WAYS, ALL MY UNDERDOGS! WE WILL NEVER BE, NEVER BE ANYTHING BUT LOUD, AND NITTY GRITTY DIRTY LITTLE FREAKS! WON'T YOU COME ON, AND COME ON AND RAISE YOUR GLASS! JUST COME ON AND COME ON AND RAISE YOUR GLASS! WON'T YOU COME ON AND COME AND RAISE YOUR GLASS…FOR ME! JUST COME ON AND COME ON AND RAISE YOUR GLASS…FOR MEEEEEE! 9:50 am_

_Athena: If we're done with our little Olympus Musical…9:51 am_

_Dionysus: We are! 9:52 am_

**Dionysus has logged off, leaving this message:**

**Raise Your Glass, fellow Olympians.**

**-Dionysus, the god who won't remember any of this tomorrow.**

A/N: THERE WE GO! (: (:

YAY! UP NEXT…Hmm…let's see…

DEMETER!

Up next is Demeter. Ideas?

I'd love to know 'em!

Thanks!

Thanks to every single reviewer and the people whose ideas I used! YAY!

Olympus Musical…ideas, ideas….

I love feedback _almost _as much as Aphrodite loves love!

~Suzie, now TheGreekGoddessAthena instead of Baby Penguin-Baby Bunny.

You can call me Suzie or Athena. Either works (:

But Suzie makes me sound at least half normal…


	15. Demeter's Page

A/N: Okay, I probably won't be able to update for…about two to three weeks. I WILL TRY! Though, I'm going on vacay! YAY ME! Btw, vacay is vacation. I DIDN'T READ THIS AFTER I WROTE IT SO sorry if it sucks (:

I don't own PJO, or Facebook, which this is PURELY a rip-off of. A very, very godly rip-off.

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Demeter's Page_

**Rants on Hades:**

**Why he needs to give Persephone back:**

**-He is mean**

**-She obviously hates him**

**-OR AT LEAST HE SHOULD REDECORATE! (As spoken by that Brandon T. Jackson kid who plays Grover in the motion picture of Percy Jackson)**

**How to annoy/scare Hades:**

**-Annoy: Rant about cereal**

**-Scare: Threaten to send wheat to the Underworld and wrap around him!**

**-Annoy: Rant about Persephone**

**-Scare: Tell him if he doesn't give her back, you'll do terrible things. Leave it as just "terrible things", it gives him more to think about and be frightened by.)**

**Why I HATE Hades:**

**-I just DO.**

**-HE STOLE MY PRECIOUS BABY FROM ME!**

**-He's lost his hotness. Aphrodite should give him a makeover.**

**-He made Persephone eat Underworld food.**

**-He RIPPED OFF CEREAL! WHY DON'T I JUST RIP OFF YOUR HEAD!**

_Comments on Rants on Hades: (30 plus)_

_Persephone: Mom! I'm not a baby…6:58 am_

_Demeter: But you're my little girl! 6:59 am_

_Poseidon: Couldn't you just forget about that stuff? Why don't you make Katie your favorite? 7:00 am_

_Athena: Please. Demeter doesn't 'favorite' her children. No god does, they all have too many to chose from. 7:01 am_

_Poseidon: You favorite Annabeth. 7:02 am_

_Athena: Shut up. You favorite Percy. 7:03 am_

_Zeus: I favorite Perseus. Or Hercules. That is, the FIRST Perseus. 7:04 am_

_Aphrodite: I have too many kids to favorite! 7:05 am_

_Ares: Simple solution on that, babe. Just stop cheating on your boyfriend-for-the-day. 7:06 am_

_Apollo: Stop being so uptight, Ares! Just because Aphrodite chose to dance with Connor over you doesn't mean anything, right? (A/N: Punishment reference) 7:08 am_

_Ares: I'm not uptight, twerp! 7:09 am_

_Demeter: You are being a bit harsher than normal. 7:10 am_

_Persephone: For once, I agree with mother. 7:11 am_

_Ares: Shut up! 7:12 am_

_Poseidon: OOH, Ares is getting told. 7:13 am _

_Athena: Says the man who gets 'burned' by none other than me every page (: 7:14 am_

_Poseidon: Don't even say it, Ares. 7:15 am_

_Ares: You just got burned, by talking about a burn. Dude, that was sweet. 7:16 am_

_Poseidon: Oh yeah? Let's see you fall off your stupid motorcycle. __**That **__would be sweet. 7:17 am_

_Ares: This calls for a dissing war.7:18 am_

_Poseidon: Agreed. Athena? 7:19 am_

_Athena: *looking up 'Ye Ol' Ancient Dissing Book Ruleths* Found it! It says:  
>Each competitor must come up with an original diss, no copying.<br>Each competitor must be serious; no joking (though dissing is all a joke) about other disses allowed.  
>Each competitor must follow the rules.<span>_

_That seems simple enough, boys. LET THE DISS BEGIN! 7:23 am_

_Ares: You get burned so badly, the fire department has to come! 7:24 am_

_Poseidon: At least I don't have a Ken doll 7:25 am_

_Ares: At least my girlfriend GIVES me things. MANY things. Athena ain't giving you nothing! 7:26 am_

_Poseidon: At least my "girlfriend" (SHE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!) is SMART and can tell the difference between a squid and an octopus. 7:27 am_

_Ares: At least I don't have 'precious fishies' that I love more than my girlfriend! 7:28 am_

_Poseidon: At least I have better things to do than look good! 7:29 am_

_Ares: I least I actually look good! 7:30 am_

_Poseidon: At least I don't STEAL things from my girlfriend. 7:31 am_

_Ares: At least I GET things from my girlfriend. 7:32 am_

_Athena: OH! Ares has used that before at precisely 7:26 am. 7:33 am_

_Poseidon: I won? But I'm normally the diss-ee. Not the diss-er. WHOA. :P TAKE THAT ARES! HAHA! And Athena's NOT MY GIRLFRIEND! 7:34 am_

_Athena: Congrats! And I'm SINGLE and I always have been (: 7:35 am_

_Aphrodite: HERE! What did I miss? 7:36 am_

_Persephone: Ares and Poseidon had a diss-war, which Poseidon won. 7:37 am_

_Aphrodite: *scrolls up* OH! I see. *scrolls even further up* HADES! I'D LOVE TO GIVE YOU A MAKEOVER! 7:39 am_

_Hades: NO! Its bad enough Demeter's whole page will be about me…I don't need to look like a fru fru "save-the-world" hippie. 7:40 am_

_Aphrodite: I was going more Mick Jagger…but fru fru "save-the-world" hippie is good too! Let me just raid Grover's closet, the old Oracle's grave, and my closet! I'll be done soon! 7:42 am_

_**Hades is scared. ~NEW STATUS FOR: Hades**__ 7:43 am_

_**Aphrodite doesn't care, Hades. You ARE getting a makeover even if it kills me. ~NEW STATUS FOR: Aphrodite **__7:44 am_

**Threats to Travis Stoll:**

**-Fall for my daughter; you get warned**

**-Date my daughter; you get injured**

**-Knock her up before you're married; your child will never meet you**

**-Marry her without permission; you just not make it out of the honeymoon**

**HERMES! Pass these to your irresponsible child, Travis Stoll, please.**

_Comments on Threats to Travis Stoll: (5)_

_Hermes: Yes, Demeter. 7:45 am_

_Demeter: Thank you! And I'm serious about this. 7:46 am_

_Athena: I've already threatened Percy. I'm out of the clear. 7:47 am_

_Aphrodite: OHH! Zeus! Will you tell your son, Jason, to get a move on it and kiss Piper? PLEASE? 7:48 am_

_Zeus: Whatever. 7:49 am_

**Reasons to hate the Underworld:**

**-nothing grows there**

**-it is a dreary place**

**-it is an un-decorative place**

**-mother-in-laws are not welcomed, but Hitler is. Mother-in-law mixed around spells WOMAN HITLER, so I don't think there should be any problem, there!**

**-My son-in-law lives there**

_Comments on Reasons to hate the Underworld: (10)_

_Hades: Hitler is TOTALLY different from my mother-in-law. 7:50 am_

_Demeter: I know that, you dunce. I was just saying. 7:51 am_

_Ares: Heh. She called you a dunce. Wait…ATHENA! What does 'dunce' mean? 7:52 am_

_Athena: Dunce:  
>(DUHNS)<br>-Noun  
>a dull-witted, stupid, or ignorant person; dolt 7:53 am<span>_

_(A/N Thanks to dictionary (dot) com for that! I wanted an exact definition so…yeah!)_

_Aphrodite: What's a dolt? 7:54 am_

_Athena: A blockhead. 7:55 am_

_Poseidon: And that is…7:56 am_

_Athena: UGH! It's YOU! 7:57 am_

_Ares: Burned. 7:58 am_

_Poseidon: SHUT UP ALREADY! 7:59 am_

**Reasons why I hate pomegranates:**

**-My daughter got stuck in the UNDERWORLD because of them**

**-They're feisty and red. I like sweet and green**

**-They taste horrible**

**-Hades has them**

**-They only bring bad things. Bad, bad things.**

**NEVER EAT UNDERWORLD FOOD!**

_Comments on Reasons why I hate pomegranates: (11)_

_Hades: Demeter, you scare me. 8:02 am_

_Demeter: Good. Glad to know everything I do isn't a waste. 8:03 am_

_Poseidon: My face hurts. 8:04 am_

_Athena: Why? 8:05 am_

_Poseidon: I got sunburn. 8:06 am_

_Aphrodite: YEEOWCH! I hate those! Red marks TOTALLY ruin my perfect tan. 8:07 am_

_Apollo: And big words totally ruin your small brain. 8:08 am_

_Aphrodite: I know! I think I'm afraid of big words…8:09 am_

_Athena: There's only one way to test it. If you are afraid of big words than you have:  
>. 8:10 am<span>_

_Aphrodite: AHHH! IT HURTS MY BRAIN! 8:11 am_

_Athena: That about settles it. 8:12 am_

**More ways to annoy your GOOD FOR NOTHING son-in-law:**

**-Tell him he is a loser and should be sent to his own fields of punishment**

**-Yell your 'colorful' vocabulary to him, making him go deaf**

**-Get him knocked out from a potion you say is a 'peace offering drink' and take pictures of him wearing a shirt that says "I worship Hippocampi"**

**-Post these pictures on Godbook**

**-Yell at him about why cereal is good for people **

_Comments on More ways to annoy your GOOD F… (5)_

_Hades: HEY! We swore never to speak of it again. 8:17 am_

_Demeter: Not on the Styx. 8:18 am_

_Hades: GRR says Cerberus. 8:19 am_

_Demeter: I don't care about your puppy. 8:20 am_

_Hades: Cerberus is NOT a puppy! 8:21 am_

**Cereal Rant**

**WHY YOU NEED TO EAT CEREAL!**

**-It tastes DELICIOUS!**

**-It's good for you!**

**-It's full of…WHEATY GOODNESS!**

**-I won't nag at you anymore if you eat it every day! (Yeah right. ONLY HADES will still be nagged.)**

**Demigods fail their quests because…: cereal edition!**

**-They don't eat enough cereal**

**-Chiron needs to feed them more cereal**

**-None of them ever think of packing cereal with their ambrosia and nectar**

**-Dionysus has a strawberry field; he should have a CEREAL field**

**-They aren't smart enough to look for a CHEAP BOX OF CEREAL to buy at a store, but instead they'd end up robbing a doughnut store! (I'm looking at you, Percy.)**

**MY FAVORITE CEREALS!**

**3. Honey Bunches and Oats**

**2. Frosted Flakes**

**1. Mini Wheat's**

_Comments on Demeter's Cereal Obsession: (6)_

_Hades: Crazy lady. 8:26 am_

_Poseidon: I always defended her about this to you until now. She should be named "Crazy Cereal Lady". 8:27 am_

_Athena: Dem, are you feeling okay? Do you want me to take you to the nice demigods with very nice nets? 8:28 am_

_Demeter: Nope. I'm fine. The only thing I want to be taken to is Hades, so I can kill him! 8:30 am_

_Aphrodite: Just come to my closet! You can pick a new outfit and everything to get your mind off of him, mmkay? 8:31 am_

_Demeter: No. I feel fine. 8:32 am_

**My Favorite Different Types of FLOWERS!**

**-Roses**

**-Lilies**

**-Marigolds**

**-Morning Glories**

**-Daisies**

**-Poppies**

_Comments on My Favorite Types of FLOWERS!: (5)_

_Aphrodite: I love ALLLLLLL of them! But mostly ROSES! 8:34 am_

_Athena: I like the Morning Glories and White Lilies. 8:35 am_

_Aphrodite: Hear that, Poseidon? She likes MORNING GLORIES and LILIES. *wink, wink* 8:36 am_

_Persephone: Seeing as I'm the goddess of flowers, I love all of them! But I especially love marigolds. They're just so colorful and lively! Unlike Hell…8:37 am_

_Artemis: I like daisies. 8:38 am_

**Demeter has logged off, leaving this message:**

**I would've gotten away with killing Hades by now if it weren't for Zeus and his stupid 'No-killing-gods' rule, too!**

**-Demeter**

A/N: hello! Sorry it's so short, but I have to get ready and such for vacay! Well, I hope you liked this chapter, and I'll TRY to get the next up soon.

As for Demeter's message, I based it off of the awesome Scooby Doo line, _"...and I would've gotten away with it if it weren't for you meddling kids and your dog!"_

And from _The Wizard of Oz_'s line, _"I'll get you, my pretty, and your little dog too!"_

Or however they go. Ya know what I mean, right? Right. Good? Good.

Up next…Iris's Page! We haven't learned much about the goddess of the rainbow, and I picture her to be a shyer one, so yeah…

Ideas for Iris? I have a few, myself.

Sad to say…only a few chapters left, my dear readers! I have all the twelve Olympian gods plus Hades and Persephone…so…

I'm afraid that we have only a few left. ):

Anyways, THANKS TO:

SistersOfOlympus

Cotedepablo911

LE101 (anon)

Reading is my passion (anon)

The no-named anonymous (seriously…they had no name.)

Little Miss Random (anon)

xxAnnabella Princessxx

greekbookluva27

Castiel's little angel1985

Katie Gardner (anon…though I wish the real Katie from the books helped me out too, hah!)

The Queen of Valencia Torgue

…and everybody who reviewed!

I love feedback almost as much as Aphrodite loves love!

~Suzie


	16. Iris's Page

A/N: Hello! I'm back from vacay! I don't really like this chapter. I don't know why, but I think it's just lacking comedy this time. I dunno, I just wasn't feeling the comedy this time….

Okay, anyway, here's the long awaited chapter of Godbook! Don't worry, there's four more chapters after this one (:

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Iris's Page_

**Why I Made an Account: **

**-Athena and Aphrodite showed me the site**

**-It looked fun!**

**-The homepage is colorful**

_Comments on Why I Made an Account: (14)_

_Athena: You're welcome, Iris. I hope you enjoy Godbook! 10:20 am_

_Iris: Thanks, Lady Athena! 10:21 am_

_Khione: I made an account too! So did Hypnos, Hecate, and Nemesis! 10:22 am_

_Aphrodite: Well, welcome guys! 10:23 am_

_Hermes: Please don't make me send Private Messages (A/N stole that from Fanfiction here, haha!) that are dirty. It sickens me to read over. 10:24 am_

_Khione: Well, why would you read other people's mail? That's like someone peeing in my snow! Who does that? 10:25 am_

_Persephone: That's also like being dragged to hell and held hostage for your "husband's" bidding. 10:26 am_

_Hades: I thought we were cool! I mean, the dance was nice and we didn't fight that much! 10:27 am_

_Demeter: Wah, wah, quit your whining! 10:28 am_

_Iris: Do they fight this much on here? 10:29 am_

_Athena: yes. 10:30 am_

_Poseidon: No! We don't fight that much! 10:31 am_

_Athena: Oh, give me a break, fish head. We fight a lot! 10:32 am_

_Aphrodite: *giggle* like an old married couple (: 10:33 am_

**Most Frequent IMers: (not in any order) **

**-Percy Jackson to Annabeth Chase**

**-Annabeth Chase to Percy Jackson**

**-Thalia Grace to Luke Castellan (RIP)**

**-Artemis, screaming at Apollo**

**-Athena, yelling at, lecturing, and making fun of Poseidon**

**-Silena Beauregard to C. Beckendorf (RIP, RIP)**

_Comments on Most Frequent IMers: (not in any order) (13)_

_Athena: Surely I don't IM him that much! 10:38 am_

_Poseidon: Yes, you do. I get screamed at at least four times a week. 10:39 am_

_Iris: Yeah…but they're always funny! 10:40 am_

_Aphrodite: OOOH! They IM each other a lot? About what? Midnight rondayvew places? Romantic dinner dates over IMs? Why Athena needs to trim those filthy dead ends? Wait…that last one wasn't romantic. Though, it is true. 10:41 am_

_Athena: I need to do no such thing! My hair is fine the way it is! And its spelled rendezvous. 10:42 am_

_Poseidon: Eh, you've had better hair. 10:43 am_

_Athena: Excuse me? What, you don't like my hair? From the way you've been flirting says otherwise. 10:44 am_

_Ares: I should get paid to do this! BURNED! 10:45 am_

_Hecate: I can easily, with a flick of a wand or a speck of magic, make your hair beautiful and compete against none other than Lady Love! 10:46 am_

_Aphrodite: What? WHO IS THIS "LADY LOVE?" I'M THE ONLY LADY LOVE! 10:47 am_

_Hecate: Darling, Lady Love is __**you**__. 10:48 am_

_Aphrodite: Oh. Wait, WHAT? Nobody's hair is better than mine! 10:49 am_

_Zeus: Has anybody ever told you that you catch on slow? 10:50 am  
><span>_

**Funniest IMs ever seen: **

**-Athena yelling at Poseidon (it's HILARIOUS and perfect with popcorn!)**

**-Annabeth and Percy making googley eyes at each other**

**-Thalia threatening to pulverize Nico if he keeps IMing her (though, you can tell they're **_**madly **_**in love)**

**-Hera screaming her lungs off at her husband**

_Comments on Funniest IMs ever seen: (15)_

_Athena: *blushing* I don't yell that much, do I? 10:53 am_

_Poseidon: Yeah…10:54 am_

_Iris: It is rather amusing, though, Athena. 10:55 am_

_Hestia: Fighting is not amusing…10:56 am_

_Ares: Yes it is, silly child. Esp. when blood and guts are involved! 10:57 am_

_Athena: Ares! War is __**not **__the answer. EVER. Nor is violence. 10:58 am_

_Ares: No, violence is the question. The answer is yes. 10:59 am_

_Aphrodite: WHAT? Violence makes people all sweaty, and dirty, and gross! Beauty __**matters!**__ Like, what guy would look twice at a girl not wearing makeup? 11:00 am_

_Hades: Apparently Poseidon. You should see the way he looks at Athena. 11:01 am_

_Athena: Whatever. 11:02 am_

_Aphrodite: Well, Poseidon is another case. He'd knock up any girl if they so much as glanced in his direction. He's just a wannabe player. 11:03 am_

_Ares: O.o are my eyes deceiving me or did I REALLY just see my GIRLFRIEND type that? 11:04 am_

_Poseidon: Don't say it Ares. 11:05 am_

_Ares: You. Got. Burned! AGAIN! By APHRODITE! 11:06 am_

_Zeus: Now, now. Let's not take Athena's job from her, Aphrodite. 11:07 am_

**Why IMs are better than Hermes's Winged Shoes: **

**-IMs are quicker than delivering messages**

**-I am WAY better than Hermes at message stuff**

**-IMs may be limited (time-wise) and delivering mail Hermes-Express or whatever may be unlimited time, but I get to SEE the reactions of people over the IMs**

**-IMs tend to be more frequent with demigods**

_Comments on Why IMs are better than Hermes's Wing… (12)_

_Hecate: Darling, darling, DARLING! IMs are a MGAICAL thing! I love, love, love using them but Hermes is a HOTTIE. Though, magic triumphs over men any day. But young, young, young one, magic, magic, magic is an amazing thing! I am with IMs. 11:12 am_

_Hermes: Yeah, yeah, whatever, Hecate. I know, I am pretty dashing, aren't I? 11:13 am_

_Aphrodite: Hehe, you sure are! 11:14 am_

_Ares: Aphrodite! 11:15 am_

_Aphrodite: What? It's in my nature, Babe. 11:16 am_

_Ares: Babe? I call you Babe! 11:17 am_

_Aphrodite: Not anymore, Babe. 11:18 am_

_Nemesis: Balance, the world needs balance. Both males and females can call their companion babe. But we _all_ know who wants to be calling a girl Babe…11:19 am_

_Aphrodite: Who? 11:20 am_

_Athena: *face palm* Aphrodite, she's making fun of you for trying to get me and Poseidon together. 11:21 am_

_Khione: Wow. She catches on slow. 11:22 am_

_Demeter: This is new to you how? 11:23 am_

**Why rainbows are the most amazing thing in the UNIVERSE!: **

**-They are BEE-YOU-TAH-FULL!**

**-They are my special item (you know you love me!)**

**-You IM with rainbows **

**-Rainbows can get kids out of class. No kidding. (A/N: seriously. They can! I was in second grade when this HUGE, PRETTY rainbow was over the church next to our school, and we were allowed to go out and look at it for a while. Okay…back to GB)**

_Comments on Why rainbows are the most amazing… (9)_

_Aphrodite: OOH! Rainbows are beautiful. I love them! 11:24 am_

_Athena: It is not good to get out of class! There might have been something important that was going to be covered! 11:25 am_

_Poseidon: Loosen up, Ath. 11:26 am_

_Apollo: Ath? Someone has a craaa-usssh! 11:27 am_

_Artemis: Dear ZEUS! All these maidens, godly OR mortal, flirting with men! What makes men so good? All men should be jackalopes! Jackalopes, I say, JACKALOPES! 11:29 am_

_Zeus: Artemis, we have had this talk. You are not to turn males into animals if they are gods! 11:30 am_

_Artemis: Fine, fine. Whatever. But you've punished us to being humans so; technically I can now…haha! (A/N Punishment. Again. Sorry, I had to (:) 11:31 am_

_Zeus: Artemis! No! 11:32 am_

_Artemis: Fine. 11:33 am_

**My FAVORITE colors! **

**-Red**

**-Orange**

**-Yellow**

**-Green**

**-Blue**

**-Indigo**

**-Violet**

**-Purple**

**-Pink**

**-Aquamarine**

_Comments on My FAVORITE colors!: (12)_

_Athena: You do know you used every color in the rainbow (ROYGBIV) and only added three more colors, right? 11:35 am_

_Iris: Yes, Miss Know It All, I do. I love ALL the rainbow colors, and my favorite non-rainbow colors are pink and aquamarine. 11:36 am_

_Poseidon: Why those colors? 11:37 am_

_Iris: I don't know. They're pretty. 11:38 am_

_Aphrodite: I'm pretty! 11:39 am_

_Ares: Yes, yes you are. 11:40 am_

_Hestia: Let's not go into any more details than that. I'm still a twelve-year-old form right now. 11:41 am_

_Zeus: Ha! Twelve year olds are probably the most dirty-minded people right now! I mean, who is this girl and how does everyone know what she says? 11:42 am_

_Athena: Father, they say "That's What She Said" when people say something that sounds inappropriate. It's just one of the immature ways they entertain themselves.11:43 am_

_Zeus: So…there isn't a woman they keep referring to? 11:44 am_

_Persephone: No, Zeus, there is not. 11:45 am_

_Zeus: Oh. 11:46 am_

**Well, that's all you need to know about me. Iris OUT!**

**Iris has logged off.**

A/N: well…it turned out okay, right? Right…

About the "That's What She Said" thing, I hate it, but I thought it would add some humor.

Anyway, next up is…KHIONE! I know that there's not much about her, but she's the SNOW goddess…any ideas?

Keep an eye out, because I'm updating Tell Me If There's Anything I Can Do today and Punishment soon!

I love feedback _almost _as much as Aphrodite loves love!

~Suzie

P.S. thanks to:

**greekbookluva27**

**The Queen of Valencia Torgue**

**Hebbhebb**

**cotedepablo911**

**EmmaTheMaster'sDaughter**

And **Different**


	17. Khione's Page

A/N: Hey! Sorry if it sucks. I wrote this RIGHT after Iris's page. So yeah…

I no own PJO, Facebook (this is a rip-off of it…haha), or any quotes from TLH or any other PJ book.

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Khione's_ _Page_

**Why I Hate Leo Valdez: **

**-He called me hot! HOT! I am COLD, Leo Valdez, very, **_**very **_**cold.**

**-He is annoying!**

**-Sure, he may look like an elf, which is associated with Christmas (cold season on some parts of the world), but he is a very ANNOYING elf.**

**-Leo Valdez is a disgrace. How dare he be let into my home!**

**-He has a crush on me!**

**-He is a FIRE BOY!**

**-He is the ONLY guy I can't freeze. **

**-He screamed "That's what happens when it snows in Texas, lady! It. Freaking. Melts."**

**-He actually **_**likes **_**me! It's annoying! Nobody else does!**

**-Remember, Leo Valdez. I am **_**cold**_**.**

_Comments on Khione's Leo Valdez rant: (24)_

_Hephaestus: Why are you insulting my son? 10:44 am_

_Khione: He called me hot. HOT! 10:45 am_

_Hephaestus: That's supposed to be a compliment. 10:46 am_

_Khione: Not for me! It is the greatest insult ever given from mankind to a goddess! I AM A FREAKING GODDESS! 10:47 am_

_Hephaestus: I'm a freaking god. 10:48 am_

_Athena: Khione, it's not very wise to complain about demigods publicly. The god or goddess who is their parent will most likely try to get revenge. 10:50 am_

_Khione: You shut your mouth you feather face! Just because you complain about your boyfriend's son and he gets back at you on Annabeth doesn't mean you are any wiser than I when it comes to demigods and their parentage! 10:52 am_

_Athena: Pardon, Ice Freak? 10:53 am_

_Khione: You. Are. Not. Wiser. Than. I. Am. When. It. Comes. To. Demigods. And. Their. Parentage! 10:54 am_

_Athena: Someone just signed the contract to going to going to Hades. 10:55 am_

_Khione: Trust me, Feather Face, I signed that contract many eons ago. 10:56 am_

_Poseidon: Uh…girls, calm down. 10:57 am_

_Athena: YOU STAY OUT OF THIS YOU FISH HEAD! 10:58 am_

_Aphrodite: OOH! You didn't claim he wasn't your boyfriend this time! So you ARE dating! 10:59 am_

_Athena: SHUT UP! WE ARE NOT DATING! 11:00 am_

_Hades: Khione, shall I get your room ready? Athena can and will find a way to kill you, even though you are a goddess. 11:01 am_

_Khione: No. I don't need a room in the Underworld. I'll kill her first! 11:02 am_

_Zeus: ENOUGH! I already sent nine gods to high school, and I don't want to send more! 11:03 am_

_Hera: Oh, shut up, Zeus. They're enjoying it. 11:04 am_

_Aphrodite: Well, Athena and Poseidon are. And Ares and I are as well! 11:05 am_

_Zeus: Ares, just don't knock her up in that form. It would look bad at a high school. 11:06 am_

_Ares: Will do, Zeus-a-rito. 11:07_

_Zeus: Zeus-a-rito? 11:08 am_

_Ares: Sorry, will do, Zeus. 11:09 am_

**Why Cal and Zethes are idiots: **

**-They're my brothers. They cannot compare to I.**

**-Cal can't even pronounce his own NAME!**

**-Zethes is just a moron. **

**-Zethes has Acne. Like, major eww alert.**

**-Calais has, like, three brain cells.**

**-They like hockey. HOCKEY! Again, major eww alert.**

**-Cal looks like an ox. Gross.**

_Comments on Why Khione hates her brothers: (18)_

_Athena: I have half-brothers, many, and I actually LIKE them. 11:15 pm_

_Khione: Good for you, Miss Know It All! 11:16 am_

_Poseidon: Hey! I'm the only one who can call her that! 11:17 am_

_Athena: Yeah! 11:18 am_

_Iris: You just agreed with him? 11:19 am_

_Athena: Forget that last comment. 11:20 am_

_Hecate: Khione, Darling, let me explain! Your brothers are a maaaaagical gift! And if you ask politely, I, the most fair goddess of them all, with a flick of a wand or a pinch of magic dust, make them the most attractive immortals in allllllll the lands! 11:21 am_

_Aphrodite: HEY! BACK OFF, LADY! I am the most fair. That was declared before! 11:22 am_

_Hera: I am the fairest of them all. My mirror says so. 11:23_

_Athena: You do realize that Snow White's evil step-mother was the one who had the mirror, right? Snow White won. You're just declaring that I, Athena, am the fairest of them all. 11:24_

_Hera: Curse these Disney movies! I mean, really, why would I have like Hercules? He wasn't even MINE! 11:25 am_

_Khione: Can we get back to me now? 11:26 am_

_Athena, Aphrodite, and Hera: NO! 11:27 am_

_Athena: Someone! Who is the fairest of us three? 11:28 am_

_~Silence~_

_Aphrodite: *pouts* WHY NOTTTT? 11:29 am_

_Hypnos: we...we…w—we just fin…fin...finished a war. We d—don't want to…to…'nother one…11:30 am_

_Athena: He speaks the truth. Wait, did he actually type? I thought all he did was sleep… 11:31 am_

_Nemesis: As did I…11:32 am_

**Why Snow is BETTER than the sun: **

**-It's cold, like me (REMEMBER THAT LEO VALDEZ!)**

**-You can freeze**

**-You will NOT get skin cancer.**

**-You can make snowmen, and then use the parts of the snowmen to chuck snowballs at**

**-You can chuck snowballs at Apollo**

_Comments on Why Snow is BETTER than the sun (what a freak that girl): (20)_

_Athena: You can get frostbite, smart one. 11:34 am_

_Khione: Yes, yes you can. 11:35_

_Athena: You know, Khione, you really are stupid.11:36 am_

_Khione: Better than being a stuck-up __**Godbook has blocked out this offensive word. Thanks ~Server**__! 11:37_

_Hecate: Poseidon, Darling, aren't you going to help you girlfriend and defend her? 11:38 am_

_Poseidon: She's not my girlfriend. And no, she'll just yell at me to buzz off. It's nice, her having a new bickering buddy. 11:39 am_

_Athena: I'm still going to argue with you, numbskull. I just have to put the Ice Brat in her place, first! 11:40 am_

_Zeus: Calm down, Daughter. 11:41 am_

_Khione: Oh, how sweet. Daddy protecting his 'wiitle gurl'. 11:42 am_

_Athena: At least my dad cares about me. 11:43 am_

_Ares: Well here's a twist. KHIONE JUST GOT BURNED! 11:44 am_

_Khione: You useless little __***blocked* **__I will personally escort your too-smart-for-your-own-good __***blocked* **__to the __***blocked…ing* **__UNDERWORLD! 11:45 am_

_Hades: She makes Demeter's ugly words sound pretty. 11:46 am_

_Khione: Why thank you. 11:47 am_

_Demeter: HEY! I'm the only one who uses bad words in Hades' company! 11:48 am_

_Khione: Looks like I've shut up…wait, what are these owls doing here? OW! GET AWAY FROM ME! 11:49 am_

_Poseidon: You sent your owls after her? 11:50 am_

_Athena: Yes. 11:51 am_

_Poseidon: Good one. 11:52 am_

_Athena: I know. That should temporarily take care of the ice brat. 11:53 am_

**Khione has logged off to deal with the owls, leaving these messages:**

**Cold is better than heat, Athena is a *blocked*, and I am cold, Leo Valdez. VERY cold.**

A/N: Well…here you go! I really liked this chapter. Sorry it's a bit short. Okay, up next: Hecate!

I always imagined her as a mix of a female Dumbledore (wise, yet confusing; magical) and one of those annoying Carnival folk who try to get you to buy tickets (that's why all the "Darling…"s and weird talk is there.

Ohkayyy…if anybody would listen, that'd be great! I have to vent…and I have some questions…

Okay, so first of all I have this annoying volleyball camp I'm going to. UGH. It's like 90 degrees in there (I'm serious. It was so hot I wanted to literally throw up today). Second, whenever I try to send a text my phone turns off! Any ideas? My Mom says to take out the battery and put it back in, but what do you think? And third, I have this new story plot planned out (Percabeth!). Should I do it later? Would y'all read it? I'll give a summary later. Thanks! Have a better day than I did!

I love feedback almost as much as Aphrodite loves love!

~Suzie

P.S. thanks to…

Lucia Diana-Ninja Queen, Athena Goddess of the Wise, Resa Hemoor, nikko daughter of hades, TheGreekFreak101, Sapphire's Destiny, Starlight Comet, and Different (different for the first part of the message Khione leaves).


	18. Hecate's Page

A/N: Hey people! I'm baaack! But not for long…haha sorry. I don't have time to thank people today, I'm working on my new story (yayyyy!) and getting ready to go to my Aunt's…again.

I don't own PJO or Harry Potter or Tarzan (references)

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Hecate's Page:_

**Why MY children are better than YOURS**

**-They can (literally, darling) take people's noses! How magical is that?**

**-They are, are, are, the best, best, best because they have me, me, me as a mother!**

**-A magical mother? Is there any more **_**Harry Potter **_**goddess than I?**

**-We can easily, with a flick of a wand or a speck of magic, get anything your heart desires…at a price, of course.**

_Comments on Why MY children are better than YOURS: (32)_

_Athena: My children are intellectually gifted, smarter and wiser than any other demigods. 11:12 am_

_Poseidon: Athena, don't go making enemies again. You already have Khione hating you. 11:13 am_

_Khione: Yes, yes I do! 11:14 am_

_Hecate: Darling Athena, your children are very, very, very smart! But alas, at least mine aren't just merely…thoughts. 11:15 am_

_Demeter: Uh oh. 11:16 am_

_Athena: HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY CHILDREN? Just because I am a maiden doesn't mean I cannot have children! I DO have thought-children, but they are REAL people too! 11:18 am_

_Persephone: Huh. I thought you would rant a bit more, Athena. 11:19 am_

_Athena: I'm not feeling it today. I save those rants for Poseidon and Khione. 11:20 am_

_Poseidon: Thanks. That makes me feel __**so **__special. 11:21 am_

_Aphrodite: Hehe! It should! Athena saves something just for you, the only boy! She doesn't rant at other boys as much as you! 11:23 am_

_Poseidon: But Demeter rants at Hades! And she hates him! ATHENA IS NOT MY GIRLFRIEND! 11:24 am_

_Aphrodite: I never said that, darling. But you're being awfully defensive. 11:25 am_

_Athena: Anyways…11:26 am_

_Khione: Which ways? 11:27 am_

_Athena: What? Left. 11:28 am_

_Khione: Why left? Why not right? 11:29 am_

_Athena: You asked which way, so I said LEFT. 11:30 am_

_Khione: Why not right? Right is RIGHT. It says it in the NAME. 11:31 am_

_Athena: Khione, two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts do. 11:32 am_

_Khione: What does that have to do with anything? 11:33 am_

_Athena: Think about it. 11:34 am_

_Khione: But what is left…left? HUH? 11:35 am_

_Athena: Then you'd be stranded in the Jungle and forced to befriend Tarzan! 11:36 am_

_Khione: but I thought Tarzan was NICE! 11:37 am_

_Athena: UGH! Poseidon is easier to have a conversation with! 11:38 am_

_Poseidon: Aw, thank you! 11:39 am_

_Athena: SHUT IT, Fish Head! 11:40 am_

_Khione: Now, now, Athena. Don't want Poseidon breaking up with you. 11:41 am_

_Athena: What? He wouldn't do that! WE AREN'T EVEN DATING you cretin! 11:42 am_

_Zeus: Break it up! I don't want my daughter and this cretin to fight anymore! 11:43 am_

_Khione: HEY! 11:44 am_

_Apollo: I can't lie. And you ARE a cretin. 11:45 am_

**Why Harry Potter is the BEST series in the world (A/N: Tied with Percy Jackson, of course!)**

**-Who do you think gave J.K. the idea to write about magic?**

**-It's full of spells, and potions, and, oh, the glorious, glorious things of magic!**

**-Ron and Hermione are so cute together. R/Hr FTW!**

**-Voldemort/Kronos=BAD GUYS. Yeah, I gave the idea as a guy being re-born (HP 4) to J.K. I mean, who didn't see Kronos regenerating? I for one did, Darling.**

_Comments on Why Harry Potter is amazing. You know it is.: (11)_

_Aphrodite: Ron and Hermione may be cute together, but Percy and Annabeth are MUCH better! And Silena and Beckendorf! And Thalia and Nico! AND Travis and Katie! 11:47 am_

_Hades: My son and my brother's daughter? Why would they EVER work? 11:48 am_

_Zeus: for once, I agree with my brother. How? 11:49 am_

_Aphrodite: You see, its simple love logic:  
>Thalia and Nico both wear black.<br>Thalia's a huntress, which she can get kicked out of the hunt when Nico's her age (just three more years! EEP!)  
>Nico is a big three child. Thalia is a big three child. Their children would be AWESOME.<br>They both love rock music (Three Days Grace, GREEN DAY, stuff like that).  
>I think I made my point. 11:53 am<span>_

_Demeter: Eh, she makes SOME point. They do match. 11:54 am_

_Persephone: Nico? Ugh, that child. He's better off as a dandelion. 11:55 am_

_Hades: Persephone! You know I hate when you turn him into those. 11:56 am_

_Persephone: All the more reason to do that, Hades. 11:57 am_

_Aphrodite: See? Quarrels are love! You know they are! 11:58 am_

_Hades: Then Demeter must just be begging for me. 11:59 am_

_Demeter: You wish, Death Breath. 12:00 pm_

**Why I am the fairest and NOT Aphrodite**

**-I am. I JUST am. I mean, I AM magical, Darling.**

_Comments on Hecate's gonna pay for this…: (18)_

_Aphrodite: IF I REMEMBER CORRECTLY, I WAS THE ONE WHO GOT THE GOLDEN APPLE! YOU WEREN'T EVEN IN THE RUNNING, YOU WANNABE FAIREST! YOU AREN'T EVEN CLOSE TO BEING COMPETITION! WHO DO YOU THINK IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL? ME! WHO'S THE SMARTEST? Okay…Athena. BUT WHO DO YOU THINK IS RULER? Darn…Hera. BUT SEE? THESE WERE THE PEOPLE IN THE RUNNING! NOT YOU, YOU NO-PERFUME OWNER! 12:06 pm_

_Athena: Yes, I am the smartest, and the wisest. I clearly deserved the apple more than anybody. 12:07 pm_

_Hera: Step-Daughter, how you amuse me so. YOU try being Queen of the gods. You'd THEN deserve it more than anybody else! 12:08 pm_

_Athena: You've seen Cinderella, right? Well, here's a hint. STEP DAUGHTER: 1 STEP MOTHER: 0 12:09 pm_

_Hera: Well, in the mean time before you get married off; enjoy cleaning up the ashes and cooking! 12:10 pm_

_Zeus: Don't talk to my daughter that way! 12:11 pm_

_Hera: she's mine by marriage, Zeus. 12:12 pm_

_Artemis: She's my older sister! 12:13 am_

_Apollo: I guess she's mine, too. 12:14 am_

_Aphrodite: She's my BEST FRIEND! Don't talk to her that way! 12:15 am_

_Khione: She's my enemy. Talk about her all you want. 12:16 am_

_Hecate: She's a friend...sort of, Darling. But nobody deserves to be treated like Cinderella was! 12:17 am_

_Poseidon: Yeah! And she's my…uh…12:18 am_

_Aphrodite: *giggle* friend? 12:19 am_

_Poseidon: Yeah…12:20 am_

_Aphrodite: *cough* with benefits *cough* 12:21 am_

_Hera: So what? She's close to all of you? SHE STOOD IN MY WAY OF GETTING THAT APPLE! 12:22 am_

_Aphrodite: It's not like you could eat it…12:23 am_

**Hecate has signed off leaving this…very long message.**

**Darlings, I'll be back! Don't miss me too much! I promise I'll comment on the rest of the pages, Darlings. And I SOOOOOOOO deserved that apple. Why wasn't I one of the people?**

***-*-*Hecate**

A/N: Hey! So I wasn't really feeling it today with the Hecate page…I tried my best, I really did, and it just ended up being short.

Well, up next is Hypnos! I know we don't know MUCH about him, but any ideas? PLEASE? I have some…

I love feedback almost as much as Aphrodite loves love!

~Suzie


	19. Hypnos's PageCollab wMorpheus

A/N: Well hello! I'm ALIVE!

I don't own Wizard of Oz, PJO, Harry Potter, or anything that has a brand-name. I also used for some parts, so I don't own the definitions for low-tide and tidal pools. I mean, I KNOW what they are, I really do, I just needed to get a correct definition XD

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Hypnos's Page—Collaboration with Morpheus, god of dreams, for Hypnos is sleeping right now._

**Hello! I'm Morpheus, god of dreams. Today I'll be speaking for Hypnos…and myself a bit, too.**

**Hypnos: Why I hate Apollo for driving the sun when I'm STILL SLEEPING!**

**-It wakes me up!**

**-It's bright!**

**-To put it simply: "I'M MELTINGGGGGGG!"**

_Comments on the Wizard of Oz rip-off: (15)_

_Apollo: The sun is good! It brings a new day! And if the sun didn't rise, people would waste their time SLEEPING ALL DAY! 7:21 am_

_Morpheus: As Hypnos would say, "That's the…the…p…point…" 7:22 am_

_Athena: Waste your life sleeping? Why? There's so much you learn in life! Why waste that opportunity? 7:23 am_

_Khione: Because people don't want to turn out like you. 7:24 am_

_Athena: Oh great, miss Prissy Pants is back. And what exactly am I that people wouldn't want to be? 7:25 am_

_Khione: A stuck up know-it-all who acts like a __***blocked***__! 7:26 am_

_Hecate: Khione, darling, there's no need for ugly, ugly words! 7:27 am_

_Aphrodite: Ugly words do not make pretty people! 7:28 am_

_Artemis: Apparently only make-up and shallowness do. 7:29 am_

_Aphrodite: Excuse me? I am NOT shallow! Okay, maybe a little. 7:30 am_

_Poseidon: shallow? You're as shallow as the tidal pools in low tide. 7:31 am_

_Aphrodite: I'd be offended if I knew what low tide and tide pools were... 7:32 am_

_Athena: Low tide is when the water in the ocean is at its lowest level; high tide is when the water is at its highest. Tidal pools are water remaining on a reef, shore platform, or just the beach after the tide has receded. 7:33 am_

_Zeus: You know too much, daughter. 7:34 am_

_Aphrodite: She's like a human dictionary! 7:35 am_

**My turn!**

**Morpheus: Demigods' most **_**embarrassing **_**dreams & nightmares!**

**-Percy's dream about Annabeth…enough said.**

**-Annabeth's nightmare about failing a Greek Mythology test (much funnier watching it…)**

**-Grover's nightmare of filthy hobos tearing apart cans and polluting the Earth**

**-Nico's dream of falling in love with Bellatrix Lestrange (Go Harry Potter!)**

**-Thalia's nightmare of falling off the Eiffel Tower, plummeting while a banjo-playing cat dug its claws into her leg (that was interesting)**

**-Piper's nightmare of having to wear all pink (clothes, make-up, shoes, and jewelry)**

_Comments on Demigods' Most Embarrassing Dreams & Nightmares: (16)_

_Zeus: My daughter has the weirdest dreams. Why is she afraid of heights when I—her father—am the freaking ruler of the SKY? 7:35 am_

_Athena: More importantly, Poseidon, you need to control that brain of your son. I will not have a mini-Percy or mini-Annabeth running around any time soon! 7:36 am_

_Poseidon: It's not my fault he's a GUY. And come on, it's not like you don't have those dreams. 7:37 am_

_Athena: *glaring* I'm a MAIDEN goddess. My dreams revolve around ancient times and the beginning of civilization. 7:38 am_

_Aphrodite: Oh, you have a boring life. My dreams are about bunnies, perfume, clothes, and which celebrity that I want to DESTROY their romantic relationships that should've NEVER EVER happened! 7:39 am_

_Khione: Wow, there's a goddess that's just as whacked-up as Athena is. 7:40 am_

_Persephone: Athena isn't "whacked-up"! Let's see you try to spend a day keeping the WORLD from falling apart from unwise decisions. OR spending a day with HADES. 7:41 am_

_Aphrodite: OR spending a day as me! Wait, never mind, you'd love that. I have a perfect life compared to yours. 7:42 am_

_Artemis: Why? Because every boy is in love with you? Boys, boys, boys! I don't care about boys! They are better off as jackalopes, deer, or any small woodland creature. 7:43 am_

_Athena: I agree. Men are animals at heart anyway. 7:44 am_

_Artemis: Finally! A sensible goddess. Well, she's always been sensible. She had to be. But whatever, at least ONE OF YOU agrees with me. 7:45 am_

_Apollo: So what animal am I, dear sister? A graceful gazelle? A frightening lion? 7:46 am_

_Artemis: A pig. All you want is the girls! Especially the way you flirt with my maidens! All men are pigs! 7:47 am_

_Morpheus: You should see their dreams. Then you'd __**really **__think they were pigs. 7:48 am_

_Hypnos: I…I'm…on…l…line. 7:49_

_Demeter: And he's back asleep. 7:50 am_

**Hypnos: Why sleep is good for you (Morpheus: he actually wrote this one!)**

**-beauty sleep**

**-resting**

**-lots of…odda…reasuhns...too tired…nighhht nighhht. **

**(Morpheus: Well, it looks like he fell asleep. Again.)**

_Comments on Why Sleep Is Good For You: (13)_

_Hypnos: whaaaa? I'm up…no…sleepy time. 7:56 am_

_Morpheus: He fell asleep on his keyboard again. 7:57 am_

_Hypnos: Hehe! Die you Voldywart…die! 7:58 am_

_Athena: Hypnos, if you're asleep how are you typing? 7:59 am_

_Morpheus: Oh, he can sleep anything. Sleep talk, sleep walk, sleep eat, sleep…type. 8:00 am_

_Poseidon: for a god that sleeps all day, he has talent. 8:01 am_

_Hades: I'd like to sleep all day, but no. I have to take care of whiny souls saying "Please, there must be a mistake!" or "Don't let me die!" I mean, come on, you're already DEAD, people. Geez, what worse could happen? Oh yeah…haha. Eternal torture. It's always fun to watch. 8:02 am_

_Demeter: I swear! You are the most immature god that has ever roamed the Earth, Heavens, and Underworld! You don't torture Persephone down there, do you? Because if you do, I swear, you'll be the one with eternal damnation! 8:03 am_

_Hades: I already got that. It's called "Listening to your Woman Hitler rant at you all day." 8:04 am_

_Hecate: Darlings, what is Woman Hitler? I thought there was only one Hitler, Darling, and __**he**__'s long dead, dead, and dead! 8:05 am_

_Athena: Hades thinks he's being funny. Mother in Law, rearranging the letters, spells Woman Hitler. I believe we may have covered this already on someone else's Godbook page…8:06 am_

_Demeter: He's not funny. He's just begging for me to feed him to his pathetic excuse for a dog, Cerberus. 8:07 am_

_Hades: Please. If Cerberus wanted to eat me, he would've done that a LONG time ago. 8:08 am_

**Morpheus: Why I am AWE-SOME**

**-I send dreams to demigods, letting them know what will happen in the future (well, except for those nightmares/dreams listed above…those they came up with on their own. Crazy godlings.)**

**-I can make you fall into an immortal sleep if you anger me!**

**-I can give you NIGHTMARES. Yeah. Who like those? Besides you, Hades. **

_Comments on Why I am AWE-SOME: (25)_

_Hades: I do love a good nightmare. 8:11 am_

_Athena: I don't! My nightmares are terrible. 8:12 am_

_Poseidon: And what would those be? 8:13 am_

_Athena: You hitting on me. 8:14 am_

_Ares: BURN! 8:15 am_

_Poseidon: Oh, would you stop with that? 8:16 am_

_Ares: Nah. It's too fun. And what would __**your **__nightmares be, water boy? Athena rejecting you? 8:17 am_

_Poseidon: No. 8:18 am_

_Aphrodite: Oh, don't lie. Anyways, mine are that bunnies turn evil! Bunnies are my favorite animals! 8:19 am_

_Persephone: What happened to your sacred animal, the dove? 8:20 am_

_Aphrodite: That? Oh, that animal's so boooooring to me now. Sure, it's love, and marriage, but bunnies are CUH-UTE! 8:21 am_

_Hera: I rather like Peacocks. Does everybody know the story? 8:22 am_

_Athena: Yes. We all know that you used Argus's one-hundred eyes to make the eyes on the peacock's feathers. 8:23 am_

_Demeter: We…did? Well, Athena, nobody knows other gods like you do. We only pay attention to ourselves. 8:24 am_

_Athena: Well, the fact that I know everything, yes. I do know everything about all gods. I have to. 8:25 am_

_Poseidon: Oh yeah? 8:26 am_

_Athena: Yes, idiot. 8:27 am_

_Hades: What was the name of the girl that died, but her love tried to come and get her? 8:28 am_

_Athena: Please, Hades. That's easy. It's Eurydice. She died from a viper sting. Her lover's name was Orpheus. 8:29 am_

_Hades: Darn, she knows all. 8:30 am_

_Poseidon: Oh yeah? Well why couldn't they stay together then, huh? 8:31 am_

_Athena: Because the deal was that they could not look back until they were out from the ground. But Orpheus turned around right as Eurydice was reaching the top. She was still under. So, she was doomed back into going to the Underworld, again. 8:33 am_

_Persephone: That is so sad. At least she had the chance to escape. 8:34 am_

_Hades: I thought we said we were good! 8:35 am_

_Morpheus: We're out! 8:36 am_

**Morpheus has logged off for Hypnos and has waked him up so Hypnos could leave this message:**

**G'nite.**

**Morpheus has logged off, leaving this message:**

**Sweet dreams, little gods. Sweet dreams.**

A/N: SO yeah, there ya go! I don't have time to thank everybody, but THANKS TO ALL for your ideas and ESPECIALLY those that I used (: All of them were great, though.

Sadly, we only have one chapter left in Godbook. I know, why not make it longer, right? Well, I started off just wanting to do the twelve Olympians. It's a bit late for that now, though. HOWEVER, I might just do a little something for y'all (:

Up next, the final god chapter in Godbook….NEMESIS! She's not mentioned much, but come on, we know a bit about her. Any ideas?

I hope you enjoyed this chapter!

I love feedback almost as much as Aphrodite loves love! (Man, I get sick of typing that. But it's like my log-out thing…)

~Suzie


	20. Nemesis's Page

A/N: So, if you've read my story _Tell Me If There's Anything I Can Do_, which I call Tell Me for short, you know that I'm currently obsessed with Johnny Cash and June Carter-Cash. SO, if there's any of them in here…that's why.

So, this is NOT the last CHAPTER but it's the last GOD chapter. You'll see. So, Godbook is coming to a close…  
>…I don't own Johnny Cash, PJO, or Facebook, which I'm ripping off right now. OR Avatar: The Last Airbender.<p>

_**PLEASE PAY ATTENTION TO THE A/N AT THE BOTTOM WHEN YOU FINISH READING! Thanks!**_

_Welcome to Godbook!_

_Nemesis's Page_

**Why you don't want to mess with me:**

**I can make your life unbalanced**

**I can give you bad luck FORVER!**

**I can cure your future kids, grandkids, and great grandkids into an unbalanced, bad lucked life!**

_Comments on why Nemesis is a scary goddess: (17)_

_Zeus: That's a bit far, don't you think? 8:32 am_

_Nemesis: No. If they deserve it, I will give it! 8:33 am_

_Poseidon: Athena deserves it! She makes my life miserable! 8:34 am_

_Athena: I try my best. 8:35 am_

_Poseidon: well, it works! 8:36 am_

_Athena: I'm glad! 8:37 am_

_Poseidon: I'm glad you're glad! 8:38 am_

_Athena: Good! 8:39 am_

_Poseidon: Fine! 8:40 am_

_Athena: FINE. 8:41 am_

_Aphrodite: Okay, if you're trying to copy Aang and Katara quotes for Avatar: The Last Airbender, at least make them the romantic ones. 8:42 am_

_Persephone: Give it a rest, Aphrodite. They're never going to admit it. 8:43 am_

_Athena: Thank you! Someone with common sense! 8:44 am_

_Khione: Who wants common sense when you're the one who represents it? 8:45 am_

_Athena: Maybe people with a brain. 8:46 am_

_Khione: You know what? I've had it with you! 8:47 am_

_**Khione has logged off. **_

_Athena: Good riddance. 8:49 am_

**How to get revenge on other gods!**

**FOR ATHENA:**

**-Send a how-to brochure to Khione: How to Start a Fire**

**-Throw Adv. Al. 2 pages into the ocean to annoy Poseidon**

**-You like Johnny Cash music, right? And June Carter-Cash? Sing that to annoy anybody who annoys you.**

**FOR POSEIDON:**

**-Send your sea animals to…ATTACK! Athena.**

**-Sing "Under the Sea" when around Athena to annoy her.**

**FOR HERA:**

**-Send your peacocks at Zeus. Sure, they can't fly, but they can PECK!**

**-Take Hephaestus's tools. He can't do anything without those!**

**FOR DEMETER:**

**-Kidnap Nico for once. See how HE feels about getting his kid stolen.**

**-Send a cereal box down to the Underworld each day to annoy Hades.**

**FOR HADES:**

**-You've done enough.**

_Comments on How to get revenge on other gods!: (19)_

_Athena: Please. I'm much further than Advanced Algebra two. 8:50 am_

_Poseidon: You like Johnny Cash music? 8:51 am_

_Athena: Why yes, yes I do. You know what? If you're going to make fun of me for that, you can just __**Walk the Line**__ into a __**Ring of Fire**__. You'll __**Cry, Cry, Cry**__ for someone to help you, but __**It Ain't Me, Babe**__, who's gonna do you the favor. In the end, you'll be nothing more than __**Flesh and Blood**__, and __**There You Go**__, off to Hades! And there __**Ain't No Grave **__on Olympus that'll want you, so we'll have to ship you off to __**Jackson**__ and hope someone'll bury you THERE. 8:53 am_

_Ares:…Dude. She burned you _Johnny CASH_ style. 8:54 am_

_Poseidon: Ares! I told you to cut that out. 8:55 am_

_Ares: And I said "Nah. It's too fun." Or something like that. 8:56 am_

_Hera: I guess that could work…8:57 am_

_Zeus: Please. I'm not afraid of…PEACOCK IN THE ROOM! PEACOCK…S! AH! THEY BE PECKING MY FOOT! 8:58 am_

_Athena: The correct way to say that is they ARE pecking my foot. 8:59 am_

_Zeus: I don't care! 9:00 am_

_Aphrodite: Her and her grammar…they're closer than me and my perfume! I don't correct people on perfume! HEY! Hera, you said you were using Eternal Grace! That's Forever Sunshine! 9:01 am_

_Ares: Babe, you just said you didn't correct people. Ya just did. 9:02 am_

_Aphrodite: Whatever, "Babe". 9:03 am_

_Demeter: Hmm…I shall do both. Thank you, Nemesis. 9:04 am_

_Nemesis: You're Welcome! But remember to send only ONE cereal box a day. More will cause him to come up and strangle you. 9:05 am_

_Demeter: Right…9:06 am_

_Hades: Aw, come on! You AND your daughter hate Nico. Persephone turned him into a daffodil! A DAFFODIL! 9:07 am_

_Demeter: Good job, my daughter! 9:08 am_

_Persephone: Thanks, Mom. I try my hardest to annoy my "wonderful" husband. 9:09 am_

**Why BALANCE is needed in the world.**

**-Have you seen Avatar: the Last Airbender? I mean, SERIOUSLY. 100 years with no peacemaker and BOOM! Poverty, warfare, every nation surrendering and losing!..And a smoking' hot prince of the Fire Nation in season three XD**

**-Avatar is exactly my point. The world would go into turmoil! Poverty, fighting, World War III would break out!**

_Comments on why Balance is needed in the wor…: (eh, somewhere in the 20s)_

_Hades: Please, a bit of war never hurt anyone. 9:10 am_

_Demeter: Yeah, it "only" caused thousands of people to die, concentration camps to be made, and families never seeing their loved ones again! "Nothing" wrong with that! Moron. 9:11 am_

_Hades: Fine, so people died. The Underworld was booming with business, though. 9:12 am_

_Persephone: Hades! That is a TERRIBLE thing to say. Say you're sorry. 9:13 am_

_Hades: To who? 9:14 am_

_Athena: Whom. To whom, not to who. 9:15 am_

_Hades: *rolls eyes* To WHOM? 9:16 am_

_Persephone: Just say you're sorry. 9:17 am_

_Hades: They aren't joking when they say like mother, like daughter. Fine. Sorry. 9:18 am_

_Demeter: Like you mean it. 9:19 am_

_Hades: Gods! I'M SO VERY SORRY FOR OFFENDING WHATEVER I OFFENDED OUT THERE. 9:20 am_

_Demeter: Better. Now go eat a bowl of cereal! You haven't had my cereal in months! 9:21 am_

_Hades: Because I'm afraid it's poisoned. 9:22 am_

_Demeter: Even if it is, you can't die, moron. 9:23 am_

_Hades: Yeah, you see, but it's the __**taste **__of the poisoning. It just doesn't do it for me. Just like the taste of that birthday cake ice cream from that one store. It just wasn't…birthday enough. It didn't make a party in my tummy. 9:24 am_

_Poseidon: Brother, for the Ruler of the Dead, you're more in touch with your feminine side than most men. 9:25 am_

_Athena: Yeah, you're one to talk since you're __**so **__masculine. "Does that puffer fish look the right shad of tan, Athena? Or does it look too…brown?" 9:26 am_

_Poseidon: HEY! That was right when I was beginning this job. It's not as easy as reading books all day! 9:27 am_

_Athena: I do not read books all day! I have a very hard job! I'M the one who has to try to be the voice of reason for those teenagers! I'M the one that has to make sure ALL the authors remember their grammar, spelling, punctuation, and ideas PERFECTLY! I'M the one that has to stay up ALL night to watch the owls! Why? BECAUSE THEY SLEEP IN THE FREAKING DAY! I'M the one that has to try to motivate all these young people into doing the RIGHT things! I'M the one that has to help ALL the soldiers plan wisely WHETER I LIKE THEM OR NOT! I'M the one that had to SUFFER with all the STUPID mistakes the Ancient people made! I'M the one that BEAT YOU, so you can just SHUT YOUR BARNACLE BEARD UP! 9:30 am_

_Apollo: She's mad. Way to go. Just like last time! She's going to replace our comfy pillows for FEATHER pillows now, Poseidon. Way. To. Go. 9:31 am_

_Artemis: You two men…UGH! You and Poseidon, brother, are probably the WORST of the gods! Being a WOMAN is hard work, right Nemesis? 9:32 am_

_Nemesis: Yeah! You try to have to keep BALANCE all day and night. It's a very demanding job, you know. 9:33 am_

_Apollo: So is driving the sun! 9:34 am_

_Zeus: You try being ruler of the gods! 9:35 am_

_Hera: Please! Zeus, you hardly rule anything except mortal girls' bedrooms. 9:36 am_

_Ares: MOM! YOU BURNED DAD! OH MY GODS! THIS IS AWESOME! Athena's got competition, now! But that Johnny Cash one…oh, that was priceless. 9:37 am_

**The Last Post of Godbook…  
>The Nominees for "Best Revenger of the Godbook Era"<br>And the nominees are…**

**Lord of the Sea, Poseidon, for his son dating his enemy's daughter**

**Goddess of the Harvest, the cereal obsessed lady, Demeter, for constantly annoying Hades**

**The most fair goddess, Aphrodite, for tricking Artemis into saying she doesn't hate men, and winning against her, earning 40 golden drachmas**

**The most wise goddess, the grammar-crazy lady we all know, Athena, for sending her Owls at Khione when she had enough of the brat**

**And the war god, Aphrodite's lover, Ares, for constantly burning Poseidon**

**Your votes have been taken and counted. The winner for The Best Revenger of the Godbook Era is—**

**What? NO! Nike. NO! Go re-count. I SAID RECOUNT.**

**Sorry about that. The drama was ruined…**

**Anyways, Nike is re-counting the votes. This may take a minute.**

**~Two minutes, thirty eight seconds later~**

**And the winner for The Best—ah, you know. The Winner Is…  
>WHAT! NO WAY! HOW THE HADES? Well, I didn't expect that.<br>(Random god *throws popcorn* GET ON WITH IT, LADY!*)**

…**ahem. Sorry. The winner is...  
>POSEIDON!<strong>

***Confetti, Balloons, Strobe Lights, whatever you imagine would go off when someone wins something***

**CONGRATULATIONS! Because nobody got more annoyed than Athena from her daughter dating Ol' Kelp head's son!**

**Congratulations Poseidon! You and the second place winner get an all-expense paid trip to…SEA WORLD! Yeah, I know you own the place, that's how it's "All Expense Paid".**

**The second place winner is…  
>…eh, you know what, that's not a good idea. She'll find a way to kill you while there. So, POSEIDON, YOU'RE GOING TO SEA WORLD ALONE! YAY!<strong>

_Comments on that really long title: (a lot)_

_Poseidon: What? Athena got second place? Glad I'm going alone! 9:45 am_

_Aphrodite: Please, you were probably crossing your fingers to get trapped in a far-away place with her. 9:46 am_

_Athena: MAIDEN goddess. Key part of maiden goddess is maiden. 9:47 am_

_Aphrodite: Phooey. Whatever, I guess I shouldn't waste love on you. 9:48 am_

_Athena: Okay. You do that. 9:49 am_

_Nemesis: Yeah, so, Athena, you CAN go to Sea World, but I bet you wouldn't last without ripping his head off. 9:50 am_

_Athena: Oh, now we're betting? REALLY? Now it's ON. I'm going to SEA WORLD! And I CAN! In fact, I bet I can go the trip without even insulting him. ONCE. 9:51 am_

_Poseidon: HA! This will be fun. But separate beds. 9:52 am_

_Athena: Separate ROOMS. 9:53 am_

_Nemesis: we got a two-bedroom suite! 9:54 am_

_Artemis: Don't do anything you'll regret, Athena. 9:55 am_

_Athena: Trust me. I won't. 9:56 am_

_Persephone: Have fun! Sea World…I wish I could go there, but freaking Hades won't let me. 9:57 am_

_Nemesis: Well, get packing you two! You're going to have a WEEK VACATION, ALL EXPENSES PAID TO SEA WORLD! 9:58 am_

**Nemesis has logged out, leaving this message:**

**Athena is SO totally gonna lose it. **

**~Nemmie **

A/N: So, I didn't lie. I told half the truth. The next chapter is really the last one. It's gonna be AWESOME!

It's going to be…AN AWARD SHOW! And it's gonna be LONG!

So, it's an award show on Godbook. I need ALL OF YOU to vote PLEEEEASE! I want to make it amazing, for all of you. Without y'all, I wouldn't have even made a chapter two. So to show you my thanks, I'm having…yes, you heard right, _**The Godbook Awards! **_And each winner/thing gets a little trophy of a big "G" for god.

So, the categories are:

1. Favorite Godbook Page

- (Any of them)

2. Most Funny God/Goddess in Godbook

-Athena

-Poseidon

-Ares

-Aphrodite (These were just my favorite gods to write their comments for XD)

3. Funniest Page

- (Any)

4. God or Goddess who you loved to read their comments for

-Athena

-Aphrodite

-Poseidon

-Dionysus

-Khione

-Ares

-Zeus

-Hades

-Demeter

-Hera (these were just the ones I laughed at when I typed them)

5. Favorite Athena Quote/Burn—awards given to Athena, person getting "burned", and person who's page it was on!

1. -"If it's a "love only" zone and Poseidon's in it, I'm not!" ~Aphrodite's Page, to Poseidon

2. -"Enjoy the smart feeling while it lasts." ~Hades' page, to Aphrodite

3 .-"I beg to differ. I can strategize your death in the most painful, excruciating way. It will all be on blueprints where I will hang on my wall. I can gather the supplies to kill you, and burn your dead body. I will bury those ashes, dig them up, step on them, burn them again, step on them, bury them, dig them up, set them to fire one last time, and then have the wind blow them away, scattering all over the earth. People will find those ashes, and then step on them. Those ashes will travel the world in the wind, and I will make sure that they come back so I can bury them and step on their grave." ~Poseidon's Page, to Poseidon

4 .-"Lookie there! Poseidon just used a big word! Should we give him a treat?" ~Persephone's Page, to Poseidon

5 .-"How many kids do I have?" (Poseidon)  
>"Too many to even be considered a "player"." ~Hestia's Page, to Poseidon<p>

6 .-"I know you want me." (Poseidon)  
>"Yeah, I want you dead." ~Mr. D's page, to Poseidon<p>

7. -The Johnny Cash Burn, in this chapter, to Poseidon

6. Favorite Quote of ALL

1. "Blow fish are fat, then skinny again, and then fat. It has spiky hair. It's a punk fish." ~Ares

2. "What is Masculinity?" (Aphrodite)  
>"Something Hades doesn't have." ~Demeter<p>

3. "You didn't let me finish. War is the QUESTION, the answer is YES!" ~Ares

4. ":P Party Pooper." ~Hades

5. "I am COLD Leo Valdez. Very, very cold." ~Khione

6. "Yeah! And she's my…uh…" ~Poseidon (On his & Athena's status (friends, dating, et cetera)

7. "So what animal am I, dear sister? A graceful gazelle? A frightening lion?" ~Apollo

8. "BURN!" ~Ares

9. "It didn't make a party in my tummy." ~Hades

And finally…

The Honorable Mentions award (that one's a surprise!)

There will also be a short video about Athena & Poseidon's vacay to Sea World.

So yeah, VOTE PLEASE!

I love feedback, but not NEARLY as much as I love all of my faithful readers (you) for helping through this!

~Suzie

P.S. Thanks to

Gingerroot15

Daughterofapollosings

TheGreekFreak101

Kazumo

AND EVERYBODY WHO HAS READ/REVIEWED/FAVORITED/ALERTED this story!

Vote please!


	21. Godbook Awards

A/N: Oh…My…God. The last chapter of Godbook. It's finally….here. I didn't think I'd feel this emotional while writing it. I cannot believe how many of you are so supportive of this story! I could not have gotten this far without all of your kind words and ideas. I cannot thank you guys enough for this!

Your votes have been taken accounted for—mine weren't included…after all, I am the author…unless there was a tie! Except for one…I had to vote for the Johnny Cash burn. After all, I love Johnny's music (: (taken account on August 20th, 2011. Thanks for votes after that, but that's when I began this chapter! I really do appreciate the votes after! Please don't feel bad, I just had to start writing some time. Plus, I did think about putting them in! And anyway, most of them wouldn't have made a big difference (: I know, how does it take that long to write a chapter? One word: SCHOOL. GRRR how I hate it.)

Just to let you know, if I refer to "Suzie and Ella," that's me and my co-author/editor/best friend! As you all know, Ella came up with _Godbook_, so I thought it's be a way of thanking her by having her in this (: I don't really like it when authors put themselves into the stories…but for this, I kind of had too! XD

(Goddess's dresses are on my profile!)

For the last time in _Godbook_…I don't own PJO. Or Captain America. I don't know if they're still playing that in theatres…let's just pretend they are. OR Harry Potter and The Little Mermaid.

_~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
>You are invited to The Godbook Awards!<em>

_Date: September 14__th__, 2011_

_Time: Ten O'clock-Midnight_

_Hosted By: Annabeth Chase and Percy Jackson_

_All gods invited! All demigods invited!_

_We hope to see you there!  
>~Suzie &amp; Ella~<br>~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~_

_September 14__th__, 2011_

With much planning, everything came into order.

Almost a month; a month! It has been almost a month since the last official page of _Godbook _and it took this long to plan. One thing planned was that, with the help of Athena and Annabeth, Hephaestus built a huge theatre like building on Olympus.

It was a grand theatre; it shimmered on the outside and in, the front of the outside was a small courtyard with a flowing fountain. The goddesses all walked in escorted by gods, their bright dresses making a statement.

Everybody had been seated—minus two gods running late. Annabeth smiled as she walked onto the stage with Percy, who had been mumbling "Trapped in a monkey suit…" all day.

"Welcome to the Godbook Awards!" Annabeth said. She let her hands off her dress, making the silver fabric fall to the ground. "Athena and Poseidon should be here shortly—they had to go get the tape of their vacation," Annabeth said. "In the mean time, feel free to relax and talk amongst yourselves."

She took a seat in one of the two chairs by the podium. "Do we really have to get all dressed up for this?" Percy asked, sitting next to her.

Annabeth nodded. "Yeah. Trust me, I hate wearing dresses."

"I think you look beautiful," Percy smiled.

Suddenly, a "We're here!" rung out through the theatre, causing everybody to quiet down. Athena rolled her eyes and walked up to the stage, handing Annabeth the tape.

"Thanks, Mom." Annabeth said. "Can't wait to see this," she mumbled to Percy. Athena nodded and walked off the stage, sitting next to Aphrodite.

"Now that everybody's here," Annabeth said, standing up. "We can begin! Welcome to the first ever Godbook Awards!" Claps rung through the large theatre. "We'll put the tape in for the last part of the awards. Now, if everybody could please find their seats, we'll begin."

Percy spoke, standing beside Annabeth. "Zeus gave Annabeth and me permission to read what all of you had to say. It was actually quite amusing seeing my dad get "Burned," as Ares says, by Lady Athena. We're honored to be here today to give out these awards,"

"As you all know, there were many pages in Godbook. The first award we're giving tonight goes to the favorite of them all," Annabeth spoke. "It was super close between three gods—Athena, Poseidon, and Artemis. But only one can take home the big "G"."

"And the winner is…" Percy spoke.

Opening the envelope, Percy and Annabeth spoke, "Poseidon!"

The god of the sea walked up onto the stage with lots of clapping. Annabeth handed Poseidon the "G" award and said, "Would you like to say anything?"

Poseidon smiled. "Yeah," he said. He turned to the podium and said, "In your face, Athena!" causing many gods and goddesses to laugh. The demigods laughed half-heartedly, afraid Athena would blast them if they did. Athena, however, just rolled her eyes at him.

"Good job, Dad. Now, let's move on to the next award," Percy said.

"The next award goes to the most comical god or goddess in Godbook." Annabeth said. "We had a hard time deciding who we, Percy and I, thought would get the award. According to the votes, there was another close call between Athena and Ares,"

"The funniest god or goddess in Godbook is…" Percy started.

"Ares!" Annabeth said. The god of war walked up with a smirk on his face and accepted the award from Annabeth. "Anything you'd like to say?" Annabeth asked after the clapping quieted.

"Only that without Athena's burns, I wouldn't have gotten this. So thanks, Athena, for being the best half-sister! Keep burning Poseidon for me, will you?"

Annabeth laughed at Percy. "Anyways," Percy said, "Let's go to the next award. Another one that involves humor—the funniest page in Godbook!"

"This was yet another one that we were debating on. I'm ashamed to say, but even I was wrong!" Annabeth said, making her boyfriend laugh at her. She turned around and flicked him on the forehead. "Sorry about that. He's just immature."

"Just like his father," Athena muttered.

"As I was saying, even I didn't expect this. But according to the votes, the funniest page in Godbook belongs to…" she started.

"Aphrodite!" Percy said, opening the golden envelope.

The goddess of love squealed as the gods and demigods clapped for her. She all but sprinted up to the stage. Percy handed her the "G" award, to which Aphrodite squeezed him in a hug.

Annabeth smirked at her boyfriend who was getting chocked to death. "Anything you'd like to say, Aphrodite?" Annabeth asked.

Aphrodite let Percy go. "Ooh! Yes please!" she said, walking over to the podium. "First of all, my page was the first! Second of all, thanks! Thanks, thanks, thanks, and Hephaestus owes me fifty drachmas now for betting I wouldn't win an award." She giggled and said, "Love you guys!" and walked off stage.

"She's bubbly," Percy said.

"Anyways, aside from the fact that Aphrodite's all _bubbly, _let's see which god or goddess won the next award."

"The next category is for the god or goddess you loved to read their comments for. It was close between Athena and Poseidon, but the award goes to…"

"Athena!" Annabeth said, picking up the "G" award. She handed it to her mother and gave her a small hug. "Congrats, Mom. Anything you'd like to say?"

"Of course," Athena said. "In _your _face, Poseidon."

"This next award is my personal favorite. I loved reading what my mother had to say!" Annabeth said. "The next category if for the favorite Athena "Burn". Awards go to Athena, the person who got burned, and whoever's page it was on."

"We have decided to combine the top two—they were both great burns and so close together in votes! Plus, the second place one was Suzie's favorite to write down after Athena had said that," Percy spoke. "Your favorite first place Athena burn is a rather violent one…well both are."

Annabeth smiled. "Your favorite Athena burn was…"

"Number Three!" Percy and Annabeth said.

"It was: -"I beg to differ. I can strategize your death in the most painful, excruciating way. It will all be on blueprints where I will hang on my wall. I can gather the supplies to kill you, and burn your dead body. I will bury those ashes, dig them up, step on them, burn them again, step on them, bury them, dig them up, set them to fire one last time, and then have the wind blow them away, scattering all over the earth. People will find those ashes, and then step on them. Those ashes will travel the world in the wind, and I will make sure that they come back so I can bury them and step on their grave." On Poseidon's page, to Poseidon. The second place one was the Johnny Cash burn on Nemesis's page! Athena, Poseidon, and Nemesis, come up for your awards!"

"I didn't think you could be that violent," Percy said to Athena as he handed her the "G".

"I can," Athena said, smiling at Percy. "So don't do anything stupid."

"We thought I was a good idea to put the first and second together, as stated before. Plus, that Johnny Cash burn was still pretty funny." Annabeth said. "Would any of you like to say anything?"

"I would!" Athena said. She turned to Poseidon. "You're not accepting that award for _my _humor." She took the "G" out of the sea god's hand and walked off stage, causing people to laugh.

"She took my "G"." Poseidon said.

Nemesis shrugged. "Revenge, dear god, revenge!"

Percy laughed at his father. "Okay, moving on!" Annabeth said.

"The next award is the favorite quote of all throughout Godbook," Percy said. "Almost every nominee was voted for, and there was almost a tie—nine votes to eight!"

Annabeth spoke next. "The winner of the funniest quote is…Hades!"

"The quote was, "It didn't make a party in my tummy!" I didn't know my Uncle could be such a kid."

"Watch it, Jackson." Hades said as he walked up the stairs. Annabeth handed Hades the "G" and asked him if he'd like to say anything.

"There's not much to say here," he said. Percy shook his head in agreement.

"Well, there's only one more category tonight—the Honorable Mentions Award, which Suzie, who had written down Godbook after hearing the gods say all of that, will be giving."

Suzie walked onto the stage in her bright blue dress. "First of all, I didn't really expect for myself to come here. But after realizing what I could do, I just went with it. The first Honorable Mention award goes to all the minor gods in Godbook! They were just as important as the rest of the gods." All the minor gods in Godbook walked up. Persephone, Hestia, Iris, Khione, Hecate, Nemesis, Morpheus, and Hypnos all were given awards. Morpheus had taken Hypnos's award for him, as Hypnos had been sleeping again. None of them had much to say except their thanks, and they all walked away in their bright colored clothing.

"The next and final Honorable mentions award goes to my best friend, the girl who had given me the idea to do this in the first place; Ella!"

Ella smiled and walked up onto the stage with her pink dress following her. Suzie smiled as she handed Ella the "G" and hugged her best friend. "Even though we aren't in the same class anymore," Suzie said to everyone, "we'll still be writing!"

Ella nodded as she spoke. "I gave Suzie the idea months ago. I was just joking around, but she actually turned it into something! Good job, Suzie!"

Suzie smiled as she and Ella walked back to their seats while the gods and demigods clapped loudly.

Annabeth smiled. "Now, here's the video of Athena and Poseidon's trip to Sea World!"

The gods clapped as the tape began playing.

"_I cannot believe that I actually did this!" Athena said. "Why on Olympus would I agree to going to Sea World with you? I could've just swallowed my pride, but noooo. I had to go be best again!"_

"_Are you admitting you're not the best?" _

"_No. I am the best. At least better than you," Athena said._

"_OOOH! The dolphins are doing their flips! Let's go, let's go!" Poseidon said, pulling Athena by her wrist._

"_You have the maturity of a five year old!" She said while being dragged._

_|\/|/\|_

"_Athena, can we get cotton candy? Please?" Poseidon asked._

"_No! And I told you, my cover name is Arianna. It's Greek. Yours is—"_

"_Dylan, yeah, yeah! But can we pleeeease get some ice cream?"_

"_No!" _

"_Oh, come on, let your boyfriend get the cotton candy," the teenage girl at the stand said. _

_Without skipping a beat, Athena turned around. "He's not my boyfriend!" _

_The girl rolled her eyes. "He obviously is. I mean, have you read Harry Potter? Ron and Hermione fight all the time. They ended up married and with two kids. You seem like you're a know-it-all and he seems…well, he's pretty hot."_

_Poseidon smirked. "She's obviously my girlfriend. She's just too happy to admit it."_

"_What? That doesn't make any sense, you nimrod!"_

_|\/|/\|_

"_You can take the bed in the other room," Athena said._

"_What? No! This one's closer to the mini fridge." Poseidon responded._

"_Exactly. Do you want to run out of food by the second day?"_

"_Yes,"_

"_Then we have to use more money to actually buy things! I have our whole spending expenses planned out. We can only spend two hundred dollars on food if you actually want to go back to Sea World!"_

"_But we saw the whole park today."_

"_Then what do you want to do the next six days?"_

"_I don't care. Do we have to stay here the whole time?"_

"_Trust me, if we didn't I'd be long gone after you said the words "Get Packed.""_

"_I would've been long gone after you agreed to coming."_

"_Go to the other room, Poseidon."_

"_Fine. I guess I will. I'll be the bigger person here. Besides, that room's closer to the bathroom so you can actually tame that rat's nest you call hair before I get up and have to see it."_

_She raised her eyebrows. "Other room. Now. And the bathroom's closer to you, Dip Head."_

_|\/|/\|_

"_Day four, boring as ever." Athena said, sitting on the small couch, pulling out a book._

"_Let's go see a movie." Poseidon said, walking into the room. "But not a documentary."_

"_Fine. But not a stupid gore movie that you men find so fascinating."_

"_No romance movies,"_

"_No filthy comedy movies, then."_

"_No sappy tragedies,"_

"_Fine, no war movies either."_

"_Fine! Then no stupid vampire romances,"_

"_Good with me, but no "Lost City of Atlantis" movies either."_

"_I don't care, I've seen them all."_

"_What movie are we going to see now, you big dope? We've ruled them all out."_

"_What about Captain America: the First Avenger?"_

"_No!"_

"_It has history in it. World War II, you know you love that time. And it had tragic romance in it! I heard from Aphrodite that the only part she paid attention to was when he was confessing his love as he was about to die!" Poseidon said._

_Athena turned her head sideways a little. "I thought the only part she watched was when he took his shirt off."_

"_Well there's an upside for you, too! Shirtless macho man!" he said._

"_Maiden goddess. Maiden." She reminded him._

"_Right…so Captain America?"_

"_I rather would like to see—"_

_Pause, sigh._

"_Fine. Captain-freaking-America it is."_

"_Let's go!"_

_|/\|\/|_

_The two gods got up after the movie ended. "That movie was pretty decent. I liked that Peggy woman. Strong, fierce. She would've been a daughter of mine. Maybe…" Athena whispered to Poseidon._

_When she didn't hear an answer, she turned her head to see Poseidon with tears falling down his face._

"_Are you really crying?"_

"_Well, how would you feel if the man you loved was most likely about to die? How would you feel if right as he was about to die he told you he loved you? How would you feel if he promised to meet you at a dance but never show up? HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF THE MAN OF YOUR DREAMS WAS FROZEN IN ICE?"_

"_Dude, calm down." A person next to the two said._

_Poseidon turned his head to see a boy with jet black hair and green eyes. "Harry Potter?" he asked._

"_No…my name's Percy. Percy Jackson."_

"_Right! You don't have the scar—wait, Percy?"_

"_Dad?"_

"_Annabeth?" Athena said, catching sight of the blonde girl behind Percy._

"_Mom?"_

"_This just got awkward…"_

"_How did you not recognize your own son?" Percy asked._

"_You…must've gotten taller."_

"_Where are the other gods?" Annabeth asked._

"_They're not…here." Athena answered. "Where are the other demigods?"_

"_Sorry Lady Athena, we meant no disrespect! We just came here on our own…Lady Aphrodite shipped us here."_

_Poseidon nodded. _

"_So…are you two, like, dating now or what?" Percy asked._

_Athena and Annabeth both hit him upside the head at the same time. "No, Perseus Jackson! I was being stupid…"_

"_Are you feeling alright? You never do anything stupid."_

"_I know. And I never will again,"_

"_So…been to Sea World?" Poseidon asked Percy, trying to get off topic._

_Percy rubbed his head. "No, why?"_

_-The Next Day-_

"_OH MY GODS! Look! They're flipping! Look at those flips, Annabeth!" Percy said._

"_You have the maturity of an eight year old," Annabeth grumbled._

_Athena looked at her daughter. "His father has that of a five year old. Shall we go see that new documentary of Chinese civilization in the fifth century B.C.E.?" Athena asked._

_Annabeth shrugged. "I was hoping we could see the one on the Ancient times in Egypt,"_

_Athena smiled. "I think we can manage that," she said. "Just know that Neith is just like me," she said._

"_I'll remember that," Annabeth said._

_|/\|\/|_

"_Are you sad it's the last day?" Poseidon asked Athena, who was rapidly packing the bags._

"_No, not at all. Ah! Poseidon!" She yelled._

"_What?" he asked, walking into the room._

"_Don't leave your boxers on the ground. Especially if their __The Little Mermaid__ ones."_

"_Hey! What's not to love about Ariel?"_

"_Everything."_

"_Ariel is awesome,"_

"_She gave up her voice just to be human. I mean, I wouldn't!"_

"_All she wanted was to ask some questions and get some answers." Poseidon said, referring to one of the songs._

"_What did your son Triton do to make her want this life so badly?"_

_He shrugged. "Everything."_

_Athena laughed. "I guess so! And did you realize that by any chance his wife's name was…I don't know, Athena?"_

"_What?" he sputtered._

"_Yes! Who gave the writers of __The Little Mermaid__ to use my name? Don't they know that Poseidon is Triton's dad and Poseidon and Athena do not get along?"_

"_I guess not," Poseidon said. Athena rolled her eyes. "Well we need to have a little talk with Walt Disney now!"_

"_He's dead, Poseidon."_

"_He is?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Well there's nothing we can do now."_

_End Video_

"So, this is the end of Godbook." Annabeth said.

"It's been a great ride, but all rides end." Percy said.

"My gods, that was the wisest thing you've ever said, Perce!" Annabeth joked. "But now, we must congratulate all of you."

"All the winners—and those who didn't win anything—it was a great time for people to read. So congratulations!"

"Special congrats to Athena, my mother, and Poseidon for both tying for the most amount of awards!"

"Ha! See, we tied. You didn't win!" Poseidon pointed at Athena.

"I did just as well as you. And besides, if it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have won that second award at all."

He stared at her in silence.

"Put that in your juice box and suck it," Athena said.

"BURN!"

A/N: Oh, it just felt right to end there. I hope it didn't suck; my writing is very suckish right now. With school, homework, making competitive team in volleyball, and trying to juggle all that with working to stay friends with my best friends who aren't in my homeroom anymore is very, very exhausting. I had a huge beginning-of-the-season volleyball tournament last weekend that lasted eight hours—and I hadn't even started a project that was due the following Monday! And I had the first tests in three subjects this week—one Monday, one Tuesday, and one Wednesday. I had to study one a night! I haven't been getting the best grades I can, either, but I try. That's all that matters, right?

Anyways, yes. This was the LAST chapter in Godbook. It is now marked complete. The girls' dresses (goddess dresses) on my profile! I hope you agree that they're good for them.

So, for the last time (for real) on Godbook, I must sign off…

I love feedback almost as much as Aphrodite loves love!  
>~Suzie<p> 


End file.
